If you do not like my house then you can figure how hard working I am by eating my dust. A little brevity makes things go a touch smoother so here are a few pictures I found.



Finally for November….
If you do not like my house then you can figure how hard working I am by eating my dust. A little brevity makes things go a touch smoother so here are a few pictures I found.



Finally for November….
Chris Walker made up the last man on the graveyard crew and was also very paranoid of cities and big businesses claiming they were the embodiment of evil. No matter how odd he acted it seemed the attacks on a small holding company made his night throwing his hat in the ring even while on vacation.
To know that he felt enough to jump in made it much easier to do so and the entire night we had gotten a plan together. Walker would get in contact with as many people on the list that he could trying to inform people what was going on. Our jobs would be to break down the company one joint at a time first would be the finances, next would be to destroy the infrastructure in the computers and finally the last would be the most difficult, and that would be to find the building and rescue whomever they can before making the building essentially useless. Putting the last nail in the coffin would be to release the information through a series of proxies in full to sources before letting the chaos reign naturally.
“That sounds like a bit of a cop out, what if he escapes authorities?”
“Oh, he won’t. I can promise that”
With that the subject was dropped as the stakes seemed to rise as our eyes began on the next mission the small funding that came from sales to tech think tanks. Packages of rights, ideas and early models sold for hundreds of thousands sometimes millions which then goes back in to these accounts. Pointing to a series of rows on a spread sheet the second sheet showed the activity as they funneled the money for specific needs. Some tools were going to be made for us as Jake explained that we had some work and that we were going to push ourselves to get this done.
Paul and me were going to be working together while Jake was going to be on his own. Stealing the items would only take the money once so the plan was going to be a little more interesting with a some of the copies of the least disgusting pictures from the computer they were going to plant an email to the manager. All research otherwise points that this company has little idea how they are getting their packages put together. From there the next package should be offered according to the details organized from an email in the computer as well. There would not be much reason for them to continue working with them from those pictures, and if they brought it to the public attention the backlash would ostracize their business. The explanation made me feel less then hopeful about everyone else if such things would only stop business between them. It didn’t help that their would also be a key logger that would let them know of anything typed in to the computer. All in all everything was going to be easy or so we thought the three of us becoming our own little group as thick as thieves. Work went by as normal as dealing with those two guys could be eventually turning everything in to a way to pass the time. Both eventually getting bored after everything getting done turning in to a small semi safe game of truth or dare with no supremely stupid or sexual dares. The person was decided after a two liter bottle was finished after buying it to spin on the tile floor. I’m sure you guys don’t care so much about the full game of truth of dare so I will just go over the various rounds. We did ten rounds.
Paul asked me what I wanted to do with my life.
Paul asked Jake why he does not do the dishes.
Paul was asked not to use magic to control the bottle spins.
Jake asked Paul if he had used his magic to get a date from a girl.
Blushing lightly he pulled a wand out of his pocket before rolling his eyes and flicking it once to bring an actual bouquet. Handing the wand over to me the weight of the bouquet seemed to be secure in the top of the wand. I couldn’t guess the trick thinking it was the kind of magic that was just sleight of hand ,and it was definitely aggravating to him as after handing the wand back he snapped it in two before handing me the half with the bouquet.
“Remember, I can do actual magic.” Before turning the wand in to another bouquet. A couple more flicks turned it into a dagger and a pencil before turning it back into a full size wand.
I asked Paul how he knew he had magic powers. Supposedly he had learned from a book he had gotten from a garage sale coincidentally after following one of the pages he had been able to tap into it. From how it easy to seemed he was fine for other people to try it although no one had any interest leaving him alone. After the incident from the restaurant the options to teach it had been much shorter then he originally expected.
Jake was dared to make some music come out of his speakers. Which was nice to hear the village people while we continued in to the later rounds. Paul would dare Jake to grab him some chips for his little magic show. I asked if he could show me how to learn how to do magic like him which ended to him allowing me to borrow the book. If I could figure it out then there would be no problems for him to teach me how to handle it. There would be some time to get everything needed for the first spell including the potion that would need to be drank. From what he told me though everything was going to be edible although the excess mint was tough to swallow for him.
I told how many siblings I had to Jake
I asked Paul if he had any siblings, he had none.
Jake asked Paul if he was still trying to make the whiskey in his room.
They were weird to be sure especially with the things that they made in their free time. Making whiskey in their bedroom and magic books, but laughing at the end of it as we walked out of the store everything was still happy between us.
So it may have been a risk with yesterday’s content, but I use it to bring up something. From good old Webster in this case
2 a : according with, constituting, or not deviating from a norm, rule, or principle b : conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern
My question is since it seems people have this incessant need to be normal, and to stick together at times on something because of the sake of normalcy. Before going any further I do not have any psychology background except getting my own mind to run semi smoothly. Normal for me though is one of those things that really when you think about it does not have a whole lot of usage in conversations nowadays.
Let me explain, for example from the pieces that have been gathered about the term what stands out to you because for me 2a and 4a seem to be at odds at least when I think about it like this. First of all no one has the pristine bill of mental health. There is small things and large things that are accounted for enough that no one is perfectly normal.
According to the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry the odds of preschoolers and school age children showing it is three to five percent. Here is the page if you want to give it a read.
Mind you this is not taking in to accounts environmental risk factors, genetic information, or personal context in relation to experiences. These things can definitely add to it and if you want read in more detail then below is an excerpt from a book called Reducing Risks for Mental Disorders: Frontiers for Preventative Intervention Research. The excerpt is called Risk and Protective Factors for the Onset of Mental Disorders.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK236306/
It is an older source being written in 1994, but it brings up some fair points that not being so up to date on such research got me to think on these things. Now without going to a fancy seminar in my own right there is not a whole lot of work on exactly on average how common these things are with various numbers being thrown around. The Mental health association of Forsyth County claims that more then 60 million Americans may suffer from a mental illness in any given year. Putting that in perspective the last estimate from the United Nations puts us at 324 million while the census website back that number.
That means just taking those two numbers in to account that means we are looking just about One in every five and that makes it a little more sobering because some of those people will need therapy and should go out to get out while others think that nothing is wrong and that they can be productive, creative, and safe members of society using the differences in how there mind is wired to some benefit that may be harder for those without certain conditions. Try to find what works for you, if you need help go find it, and if you don’t need help be the best person that you can. That’s really what all this boils down to. Do not worry about being normal, and instead worry about what you can do to really make yourself the best you possible. That will take time. You will have to learn more about yourself.
I hope you all become the best you can be.
More then a couple years later and some tweaks through the night and there are some pages already set up for different things to come along and stay on my blog. Writing projects are getting close to completion and I think some space should be made up for it again. I found a theme I could actually enjoy more so and feel good with having for long periods of time it seems to work well for everything I want to do with it.
Even years later parts of it just has not worked as well as I had wished. Other times when trying out other themes despite the technical workings they just looked boring. I actually looked at it after tinkering with everything and went.
“Oh, it looks like my blog now.”
Only took a couple years, countless attempts, still trying to find my voice on some things, late nights and superkick parties to get it to this point.
Since then the projects have been going although the more artistic based things are slowly taking more of my time while my body needs time to recuperate. Currently though it does give me time to put things in order and use my blog as more of a tool in some things then just my thoughts on this, that, and the third. I can also get a portfolio set up as a project and use that for other things.
What gets me is how many people have subscribed to me as a blog because one thing I have not done is brought this to my family. Family from what I have been reading is supposed to be the first group of people you bring anything like this for those first few likes and whatnot. Even when I put it up on my personal Facebook page to begin with my family didn’t touch it, and that is okay. Now the blog will have a new Facebook banner when I get to it and everything is at least not blowing up in my face.
One more thing off the list, and the blog is looking nicer I think. We will move on to more victories (hopefully)
I originally wanted to get to a speed of two videos per weekday. I can say that at least I can get that to happen with all the health issues going on. There is so many things being made that there is always something to find. Whether it is something from the past or something made for someone’s class games are things that make people happy and as I said before I will do this as long as I can.
Some of these games you will see have been done on other people’s pages, but there are also some that you will have never seen before. Games that your child can play because they can be fun without hidden swear words. Games for adults going over deeper issues like suicide, depression, and love. I can find a lot of treasure.
I invite anyone who loves games to just check my channel. I am not PewdiePie or JackScepticeye or Markiplier. I don’t need to be. I think the games after you see them will make you want to play them. You do not need a massive gaming rig to do these games. My laptop despite being fairly new is an all around model that specializes in nothing, but can hold its own in a few things. It will never run Skyrim at 60 fps with full visuals engaged, but maybe if things go well I can at least do a SNES emulator if things ever go well enough. Just as likely I would do a full playthrough of a game that just really interests me.
Eventually I will be trying to make my own games currently the card game is taking the time so it will be interesting to keep things in mind while I work on these videos. It is really nice to see how things ebb and flow in popularity and quality as time goes on.
So I couldn’t post yesterday but I think I have enough for two posts today to right the scales.
The reason I couldn’t do any typing yesterday was that I had to go to the hospital. Picture some big dude in a black t shirt and jeans walking away with a slight swagger going to the restroom only for them to not come back. The big man who was swaying lightly now is suddenly dizzy enough that without the walls to walk he cannot go anywhere.
Take all that and suddenly everything is spinning all you know is your feet are under you in some fashion. After the retching, the loss of feeling in your arms, you keep trying to push yourself through the day. Day after day just trying to get something started and for it to be struck down again was something that really got to me. I am usually the person that can do something and just over the past few months the only news received was something is wrong and we just do not know what.
Right now typing this everything feels like its spinning around me and if I go any faster then a snail’s pace then I will find myself in a wall or on the ground. Now for a while I have been trying to get some insurance to get checked out properly. Without proper use of one’s arms, without the ability to balance properly, without the ability to even stay standing makes work a touch difficult. Actually I was swaying so much that even working at getting to my desk was an adventure, and work thought I should go the hospital. Really though it killed me because even typing this the spinning has not stopped, but when I sit down it does get a little better. Still cannot move as fast as I had wish, but that does not mean we will stop. We just have to rebuild again, and I have to keep my head up to do it.
It really sucks because that was not the case about a year ago. All this started with a case of cellulitis in my legs. Since then it has been more and more problems that just seemed to knock me back when I take a step forward. Aggravating in any case over the year it took am moment to decide on a picture for this one. Being the wrestling fan and considering that there is a fight club wallpaper on my laptop right now the most sense for stuff I had found.
I thought I should start off with the problems that I know I have doing this blog for so many years and getting some things out to be read. I feel it could be a touch more successful. I do a very small amount of advertising on it. Over time it has always been my biggest problem because I would want to put it in places where people could enjoy it, but on the flipside I don’t want to endlessly advertise it to the point that people are just sick of it. Doing it has to be done with a balance between the two because although I do not have a more focused subject blog there are things that I have learned that can be useful to others.
Youtube is the same way I want to advertise because there I games I find that are really fun, yet free to play. I do some other videos about subjects, but I find that having it be just on one subject as a blog or a channel makes things somewhat boring. There will always need to be some variety to make them really come through.
It is something I actually spent many hours poring over different strategies, and how business works on both sides to get a better understanding of how some may look at it. Putting it all in my head there was nothing that really felt right until while I was in bed rolling around from the pain of a popped tendon that it struck me.
Keeping all those things in mind made me lose the point. Something so astonishingly simple that looking at everything made me want to just slap my head. It will be something that kinda gave me some information that was sorely needed. Looking back, yes some mistakes were made and some things could have been done better, but I do some good stuff. Since I do good stuff between this blog and the channel I need to find ways where I can just take a step back and have more fun with it without it being a soul crushing defeat like so many projects of people tend to turn into.
I wanted Shattered Reflection to reach 65,000 word wise. It would be on the lower end of things and I can put in enough stories that a good number of people would find interesting. I had pushed hard to make it to 50,000 enough for about 77 pages which is pretty hard to do considering everything, but that was okay. Doing it had done a lot to look back learning little bits about myself.
Fighting under street lights, being shot at multiple times, betrayals and few true good friends. Everything that had been powered through in my life made a lot of interesting stories doing things that some people may not have had experience doing. I was a backyard wrestler, a problem solver, a doodler, cook, and an all around smart ass. Call it the passing of genetic talent when it comes to that last one because if there was anything my family had in the vein of born talent. Back to the point at hand though all the stuff to this point made me realize somethings.
Normally, I do not want to be really cocky for the most part, or I will turn in to a persona that is cocky to comedic effect. Looking back at everything in the format of a book made me really gain some perspective on some things. For all the work I did burn myself out on it so taking a moment away will do some good while I work on some other writing projects.
There is a short story I have been meaning to type up just on the thought of prom experiences. I never had any great ones, but I also am a fan of the sweet romances. Think like Kakashi from Naruto except even more saccharine romance being read.
Also, I have something going on where I may get a camera for the two food books that need them. Finally getting that portion done will make me happy, as it has been on the docket for quite a while. Getting those projects closer to completion would make me a happy person.
A thirty one day blogging challenge has seemed interesting to me. It also sounds very hard to do. Despite everything right now I cannot think of how things would go for thirty days of blog posts. I am going to try though. It never hurts to challenge yourself, except you know when you challenge yourself and it does hurt. I am sure you people understand the point I am trying to make.
I will give myself some rules to work by to prevent cheesing. I want to put stuff up I can get behind whether it is an opinion piece, writing, excerpt, project update, or something else.
Three hundred words is the minimum of things per blog post, and the reason why that is the minimum amount. Going under that would seem to be a post that does not allow itself some substance. If suddenly a ten thousand words or even a couple thousand words post may get a little boring to slog through. If there are going to be longer posts it may be small stories or longer excerpts from some of the books.
I think this will be something good in the long run provided I can connect on the full month of October. The full month will have one post for every day making 31 posts total. This will get interesting just on the part that everything would be. For all of the posts I will try to have as many pictures to keep it interesting. Using pictures that I don’t make is something I have to work on because there are things that could definitely use a picture, but how I give credit for the pictures was something that always confused me. Outside of memes or little sarcastic thing or memes where as long as I am not selling or profiting directly from it.
It is a strange place where people despite all the good it is to work somewhere you are fulfilled at. For artists in some fashion from writers to youtubers. Youtube can be an art for the effort that goes in to it. People try to do things they love to make the world a better place and their is this one critique that makes me want to start headbutting people.
“That’s not a real job.”
People I know who have gotten to that point in their lives I have nothing but envy for. It would be great to work somewhere you want or do something you want and pay the bills. It boggles the mind how people cannot be down for that. It isn’t everyone who can get themselves to that set up in their lives. Between working somewhere and hating it or taking the chance to get a shot at something much more fulfilling the second one would always be the choice for me.
When people seem to lob the excuse forward when something does not go as expected it makes me wonder why it was even voiced to begin with. According to good old Webster it states how it is a paid position of regular employment.Statements like that make little sense to me except showing the misunderstanding of some people.
It is one of my goals to be in a position where writing, drawing, doing the youtube thing, and overall just creating can get me a comfortable income. From there I want to change the world with business, but I still want to make it creating things that others can enjoy. It is going to be hard, and I know that. Not to play the sob story, but I know that there are a lot of odds counting against me. That is the case with anyone trying to get there no matter who it is. If you have the money to help with that. So maybe others will not think of it as a job, but if it can be done then it is a better one then all the jobs that pepole hate to do.
If effort on what I want to do while getting paid is not a job then what is it. No, what I think people mean by it is reflected by the statement they should be saying instead.
“That’s not a real bad job.”
