Writing

I write things when I can actually get enough letters together to make sense.

Short Update

I had some recent problems that cracked my spirit a bit bu I managed to get within 4k words. it is so close that it could be done provided I get one more day of good rest which seems to escape me.

Recently my father, who has been helping me out as my condition worsens as been touted as someone living at the apartment despite him driving to and fro almost every day. On top of that, there was a recent letter telling us we had to leave on December the 1st because of it. It had to take three different people telling them that a provision in their contract is against city law especially on what accounts for a guest. Their determination to keep with their contract despite it impacting what the city counts as renters rights.

Far be it for anyone to actually read the law. It is hard enough to fact check them because many times when you ask for a copy of the contract they will not give you one until it is signing time and they rush you through as soon as possible. We are still doing the channel when the living conditions get hammered out which may be in a fair amount of time. Where things stand now, I can still record portions of it as well as work harder on my writing and be learning to make art from the computer.

I am going to try and sleep once again.

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Update so far

I originally came out of the gate strong with a full 6,000 on the first day. Thought the sooner that it could get done meant the sooner it all could be over with victory well in hand. My health decided to throw the spanner in the works there.

I can barely move now without bumping in to anything, I need a cane full time, and I am currently on Tramadol that makes the dizziness in even worse. On top of the other factors just having my body deal with burnt out any lead I had as now I currently stand  going on the same rate which is something that I did not want to happen. Trying to draw blood for the tests was something too difficult that the office was afraid I would pass out with the loss making it even harder to get more tests done.

On the good side of things. I helped design part of someone else’s cover. Did a little art jam to start getting used to paint.net as a major art setup and I feel with time it may just be able to do what I wish. It took me about 30 mins, and after putting it up as something to help an actual artist they actually enjoyed mine to the point of picking it to use. It will get me a nice little nod, and credit for the illustration in book. That was not expected, but hey as long as everyone is happy then it is something that can be at least put in the art portfolio.

Still got time to pull this writing challenge around. 30k is a good place to be, but I will be a lot happier at 50k. Their is also another non fiction book idea that will be worked on after this writing project is done. It seems that after this month their are a couple ideas for a December goal.

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Everything all said and done it was interesting so where does that leave the blog going after this because doing daily posts will be rough. First, is the whole thing of what will be done in November there will be posts twice a week instead of a rolling tally just to keep some of my sanity in tact allowing me to focus on the matter at hand.

There are some failures that need to be righted this month. While that is going there are other things that will need portions of my attention. Keeping it to a more conservative blogging schedule like that will be important, and I will try to clear the 50 k as soon as possible.

Last year taught me how my health could nosedive even further. The year before that taught me how I could better prepare for it. Part of being so serious is also the mind set. If I can’t do this after the third try, the thought already in my head is if I can be a writer at all. Having my hands and arms hit by this mysterious sickness only drives me up a wall. I will not let my health take something like this from me. It will be a proof of concept. Can I write enough to possibly be an author? Is there enough to pull it off?

Maybe there is who knows, and all I can hope is at the end I can look at it with the pride of a victory. I don’t think I can suffer the sting of defeat on this for a third time with all my doubts. Part of why this one will also be so late is because as of me typing this it is 11:30 PM which means this challenge is over. Completed despite a couple hiccups in the timing everything was finished.

🙂 ← This is me smiling, and if you ask my family it happens maybe a dozen times a year.

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Eddie G.

The best parts of my work I feel is when I have not been in the best frame of mind. It sounds weird, but I just need to be pushed a little bit before I really make my best moves. Some can call it being a villain, but I am a guy where new rules get drafted after my presence has been allowed. The previous sentences also sounded so high and mighty I had to laugh at myself for a bit. In all seriousness though finding that edge may be important to me and with my position I hope the pressure makes diamonds out of some unassuming lumps of coal. The worst thing about pressure though is it does burst pipes.

In my situation, that may not be the best in the long run. In any case for those who don’t see those as the hero in their own story then I have something that always helped get in touch with my more devious side. You can look him up, he was a pro wrestler that really made me think you did have a chance doing what you wanted. He was not the biggest or strongest wrestler, but he was skilled and his whole gimmick was that of being the wily veteran in a world of bigger wrestlers.

His name was Eddie Guerrero. Despite being gone for many years his videos on Youtube will often have more views than the pro wrestling promotion’s channels. He was the man who beat Brock Lesnar for the WWE title before Lesnar went to UFC. Eddie was one of those guys that came along very rarely, and everyone was happier for him being there. From fan’s to other wrestlers there was not a whole lot of bad talked about him even a full decade later. I also got a teacher to become a fan because of one of his catchphrases.

“If you are not cheating, then you are not trying.”

This, of course, was not meant in a relationship situation, but in a situation where you are trying for a goal. A great duelist when I was younger gave me the talk how at some point everyone cheats, and despite not taking some roads yourself you can defend against it by learning it. Happy Halloween.

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Blog Challenge Retrospect

This was a lot harder than I had originally thought. Doing different things each day was difficult just to the concept of what should be allowed. Doing this has taught me how to relax when blogging. I have been always a little uptight as could be seen from some of the first posts when I had no real idea how to handle things.

I always have a habit of wanting to try something then jumping right in quality be damned. I don’t think this will ever be a blog that makes me money. It was originally about my pursuits and my hobbies and it will stay that way. The over saturation of a subject on a blog can seem to me a touch like over saturation of your own market. When there are a million things about one subject in one place I think it would constrain me. In just this month we have gone over, writing attempts, game articles, Hufflepuff pride, NaNoWriMo, different story excerpts, Youtube channels, recipes, psychological terms, meanings of them in social circles, and plenty of sass and vinegar.

One of the other posts I will have is something a bit more emotional than my usual style of writing. I will try to keep it above my usual form of ranting, but no promises. Emotionally is a state I really do not talk about because it doesn’t have a whole lot of a place in my world. I can’t feel anything because other people need me to look at things to right the ship or be that pillar that people lean on when everything goes crazy. Doing that becomes quite tiring especially when you have to learn something on the fly or explain to someone that should already know their actions could go and hurt others.

That is a post for another time because if anyone has been keeping track I do have a couple left to go to make this challenge complete. MAybe, these things will change later maybe they will not. We will see then.

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Off we go…(soon)

So in getting ready for the upcoming month I had worked myself up. Not in just an anxiety, but the Pringles on my shoulder were just making me a little steamed at everything. Helping to get some aggression put away decided to play one of the games I reviewed and completely beat it in the span of a couple hours. I had fun with it for what it was it had 96 puzzles that took a lot of thought on patterns fitting only certain pieces in an exact area leaving no open spaces or overlaps. It is on Steam called Sigils of Elohim. You can look it up if you want. It is free on steam and if you play The Talos Chronicles then you may get some in game stuff out of it.

I want this to be my month after this challenge is finished coming up. When I put everything into something and fail it just drives me up a wall. Making sure I learn from it is one thing, but it still just takes up space when I put my mind focused on something without figuring it out or completing it.

That’s how I got my first book done. That is how I finished the Spartan Sprint. I feel like this time this challenge will not get the better of me. Yes, I have harped on this before, but that is just a perfect example of how it kinda wears on me Sometimes it does happen and you do your best while things just do not head your way, but trying and being unable to finish something due to a lack of skill just takes something out of me.

I thought about how I could get the most out of the challenge. Figured how I could best use my strengths and hide my weaknesses on this challenge, and after all the thought it is just time now to wait until the green light. I won’t be talking in groups so much because of it. The blog challenge I have been doing has been something of a warm up and test in one go because I have also had to look back on my previous pieces that will be finished and familiarize myself again with the workings. Good luck to everyone on it.

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Nanowrimo – Title in progress

“Something to show that we are a lot deeper then we had thought.”

Nodding lightly I could see they did not want me to know. Which was aggravating I mean because I had gone out for these guys what could be so painful to look at where two guys one being shot before had finally broken down to tears. Taking a deep breath I decided to see what was on the computer myself going through the door with a purpose. I was mad as my steps echoed off the tiles before stomping away in to the break room. There may have been a slight temper tantrum being thrown however. for everything I just went through including illegal activities, I felt had the right to know.

Opening the door with a silent push the laptop was on the table and with a push of the key the scree was beginning to brighten…

Her tears still got pulled the anger of everything welling up inside her as she pushed away from the desk. She could not put so much of this or she would have to sell the book in the adult fiction section. Looking towards the clock she was halfway through the night with plenty more to get through. The files were a dry shock to everyone’s systems before showing them what they had to do. After all it was just the beginning of that week and now that they were gone she could barely put herself together. She was supposed to go to college figure out her life and live like everyone else. Opening the door to see no one still up she went back to her bed before laying across on it to pull a small shoe box pulling the top off. A collection of items littered the inside of the box in a random placement. Each item lead to something that she would take to remember the situations they represented.

A half dollar, half of an old school stage magician’s wand, an hourglass pendant, the clipping from a hospital bracelet wrapped around a small Johnny Walker blue box in particular drew her attention while everything else seemed to fade in to the background. Running over the old polished metal of the half dollar the late summer wind could still be felt if she held it close. Quickly draining an energy drink had begun to pull the blood back in her wrists the pressure of long hours writing beginning to take their toll. Hopping off the bed with can in hand the desk was soon cleaned and re set with another snack as she had unknowingly snacked her way to the bottom of the package during the last round of writing.

Their was a list with pictures attached to a set of files in a folder labeled “ Business Opportunities”each name was their own sub file filled with a combination of a two word files one marked intel the other marked mission. From those at the earliest file dates marked more then three years ago the pictures had barely shaken off the grainy aspects older cameras would have. The pictures though showed the fates of those they had already gotten to. Graphic bloody violence framed by a scene of what looked to be a battle that was waged before they eventually fell. Clicking on one file and another the small thumbnails of images rattled me as I made my way up the list. There had been almost no survivors up to the pair of names that seemed familiar. Jake Cozy the one above it named Paul Gordon with both files having some pictures from their time in the building it looked like the various steps of. Moving up there was still twenty to thirty files with no pictures leaving the argument open that both of them were top priority.

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Fault Of Fact – Rough draft Excerpt

While the master sat he thought about the choice to be made. Itassis and himself had almost a storybook romance which would have brought humor in other times because both were very realistic learned people. Neither of them had really thought about love with both instead deciding to work on making their lands better for all. It was in that they had begun to bloom as a couple even spending a couple nights together in each others abode. His at the manor and hers at the main settlement. All of that were just memories as the happiness he was beginning to explore was taken away leaving only a cold ache where his heart would be.

Standing up the decision had been made. These people had hurt him enough that if he was not saddled with the family duties he would not have let it stand. Getting the attention of his wait staff with his action he had told Grast to being packing for a long excursion and to get the boat ready. Still in his grip he had only wished it to be true before beginning to talk while he began clearing his desk of the things he would want to bring. He would leave to go to her burial.

Hopefully, those on the other coast could forgive him for not protecting her. While walking out on everything was still difficult, it was no longer impossible. Being here to continue his duty would not be impossible knowing what the people took from him, the chance of help and the hope of peace snuffed

out left a void of despising loathing blackness where the mayor’s usually inexhaustible faith of the good was. Watching him stand all of the energy that usually defined him was nothing more then a smolder as if the fireplace had been uncared for while everyone slept, faintly casting embers upon his very soul.

“Sarah, do you know how long me and Itassis had been working on a solution for both sides? Do you know how long your lover just sent our whole land back because of negotiations and possible war?”

He ran in to her at full steam flying past Grast before sliding her up the wall. His teeth were clenched in rage while her hands were over his trying to break the seemingly iron grasp. Turning back the older man had to struggle just to try to break the grip.

“Young master, this is not what she would want. Please, Sarah did not know!!

“She’s DEAD!! SHE WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT I Want…”

Dropping his shoulders before turning around moments of her life mad themselves apparent in the stark moonlight. From the desk where both of them would work in to the night finding out ways to make everyone happy. The painting that caught her the first time they had met. The couch where they both shared their first kiss. He could remember how she smirked at his blush. All of it was gone now.

“Grast, I apologize. Go to the settlement, find her body and her belongings. Have it set on the boat. I am going to take her back home. Sarah, you will not be in my sight again. Just knowing what your husband did with the aid of the people in this village I cannot stand right now. Take the night off, now leave.”

The last words were a hiss while the young maid escaped from sight. Grast stood in the light of the doorway while looking at the young master. Silence seemed to stretch onward amazingly before his thoughts were finally verbalized.

“Are you coming back after the funeral?”

Walking by the eyes shown that he had not decided, as he walked down the hall it was clear that the pain had struck him deep. Hobbling to the nearest porters, he had to guess how many people would be needed versus how many were in any condition to ride. Taking the night air as he could it seemed like everything was careening toward a bad end.

“No. Grast I will not be returning. Turning to where Sarah stood he showed no emotion in the hazel of his eyes before continuing, I will not be known for the start of a massacre because of the idiocy of my people.

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Good Days and Bad Days

I have good days, and I have bad days. The good days I do good work on my YouTube channel, and maybe do some writing and just see how I can do better on my non YouTube things like writing for example. Working on different stories or getting over a crippling set of sociopathic tendencies keeps it interesting. For those who do not have a grasp on the word then here is the meaning straight from Webster

sociopathic

adjective so·cio·path·ic \ˌsō-sē-ə-ˈpa-thik, ˌsō-sh(ē-)ə-\

Popularity: Bottom 40% of words

Definition of sociopathic

  1. :  of, relating to, or characterized by asocial or antisocial behavior or exhibiting antisocial personality disorder

Ya, kinda weird for someone with a social account, but that is the funny thing because part of me believes there is good in the world and there is the right everyone has to be happy. On the other side of the coin some days I wake up have something happened and just know that if I spent the rest of my day in frustration banging my head against a desk or table, maybe tripped on something and smacked it through the dry wall then at least I could knock myself loopier then I am currently.

My old twitter locking down before being between my losing the email and the password and not being able to get to the old one just is something special that marks your day with that special kind of eye crossing frustration that makes you want to shake your cane at someone. For those without canes you may use your fist, a stick, or some form of high explosive whichever works best for you.

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Ten Things I have Learned In Kitchens

Learning in kitchens on the west coast has allowed me to look at a world that despite the many shows on the subject still do not do a good job showing off some of the most interesting things in the cooking world.

  1. Cooks do not get paid well and often times the wait staff will be paid more because of the tips. A line cook will often get paid the same as the wait staff with some of the better places being only a dollar or two above.
  1. Waitstaff or the front of house is a love it or hate it relationship. Simply because many times those tips that the waiters say they need to survive well in some states that is the case in Oregon though it is normal to get paid a full minimum wage and then have your tips go on top of it leading to many waiters getting paid more then the sous chef.
  2. No, we do not spit or screw up the food. It is the very rare person who feels they need to do that and most kitchens will send them out on a group of pitchforks. The food is something you do not screw with if you want an easier life in the kitchen.
  1. The personalities are that varied, and despite all the hours being worked it is rare for someone to just be about food. Some people will be marksmen, others will be writers, others work on the care of poisonous plants. Calling them weird is one of the fastest ways to get a figurative backhand for your efforts.
  1. I have to this day not met a cook who cannot hold their booze. It is not a requirement, but you can bet if you have worked a few years in a kitchen then you most likely have some tolerance.
  1. Coming in just before closing especially after a busy night will have the curses of the families of those cooks sent against you in any form. Within a half hour to close they want people out so everyone can go home to try and sleep.
  1. If your waitperson says the kitchen screwed up and that is why it is taking so much time then they forget to put the order in. Nine times out of ten anytime the waitstaff asks for more time it is because front of house botched something or massive mechanical failure usually because front of house botched something.
  1. Saying the line “I went to culinary school.” as an evidence to skill will make everyone hate you. Do not say it. Shut up and do it the way they ask. After things have died down, as why it is done that way and most time you will find most above you a lot more welcome to explain.
  2. Saying the line “Bobby Flay did it.” as an excuse as to why you are doing something will get you the next opportunity to find the left handed spatulas. They are right next to the backup cans of steam.
  3. Never as a customer go back in the kitchen. If you are the pope then be ready to bow to who is running the kitchen at the time. No matter how many yelp reviews you have written going back there will get you often kicked out or at minimum made a fool.

It is nice to have learned so much over my years because it is another world in the kitchens, and something so strange is often just between a couple sets of doors and usually a bar. I may write more about it later, enjoy the list and have a good day.

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