Author: MrBigTAnderson

Dancing Madness

There is a lot of things to be angry about but Portland is my home, recently we had a large hoopla about the federal troops coming in. Now, unlike what seems the entirety of the vocal political class, instead of getting something done let us take a look at something substantial.

https://public.tableau.com/app/profile/portlandpolicebureau/viz/DispatchedCallsforService/DispatchedCalls

This is the screen where the data for the Portland police is tallied and this is the response time, and the reason why this is important is for a high priority call the time to get to a call is five minutes. High priority being your rape, murder, someone is getting expressed of the mortal coil or someone is trying to put something in someone.

The lowest time, lowest, was February with fifteen minutes. The highest was September last year with 25, and we don’t have data for September yet this year.

Now, this picture is the front page as of the last day in September, and this is all the reason why Trump can use Title X. for those new here I have been complaining about this for years and pardon me but you can’t beat the classics.

YOU CANNOT CLAIM NOTHING IS WRONG WHEN MORE THEN HALF YOUR CALLS Have A TEN MINUTE RESPONSE!

When your goal is five minutes, and mind you this is just high priority calls. After a year and the best you get is three times your goal, then you are understaffed and we have been. That is one reason for title X. Another is can the city effectively enforce the law. Looking at this, no. Twenty minutes means they cannot effectively enforce the law. All of this is not because Trump thinks Kotex and Portland are crap, these numbers are your problem, and if these get fixed there is no ground for them to say.

Now I have talked about this and people go” Well trump will find another reason”

Listen, I know I can be a bit abrasive. I have the personality of a cactus. When someone does not like you, you do not make their job to ruin your day easier. All of this is within the law, you don’t want feds here, get the house in order which people have been complaining for a long time.

Our mayor decided to dance instead of work on this.

Our city council decided instead of working to appear and use it as a political stunt.

Portland isn’t about finding the next democratic star, it’s about getting work done. If we cannot find people who get work done this time, maybe we need to have different people next time.

Dems are not making themselves loved or even respected and in Portland where one of the most liberal areas in the country stand, we are making sure it will not be standing like it should.

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Disability Advocacy High’s and Low’s

Nine months of trying to figure out what to do, and there had been some things that had changed, one had been my awards and work.

As a disabled advocate I have been working on different projects and there had been some more activity intensive then others. I put in a lot of hours even when it doesn’t help my position for the simple fact that it may, and that may sometimes does pan out. It became clear that a lot of things are not what they seem. Where I work is now in the community college and even with differences of opinion, I have found it to be a welcoming place for different opinions and intelligent conversation.

Are there some bad eggs? In a major group of people you are bound to have at least one, because the gods of the odds dictate it. I do think we do well for the amount of people we have we are at least somewhat better than the odds.

What bothers me with work is that sometimes you realize the talk about the state or the city being so good working with disabled people is not as true as it should be. Which it isn’t so bad if it just needs to be fixed, but it is aggravating when buildings need to be made ADA compliant, or how people avoid being fined because their insurance wanted to wait out people who didn’t have money.

One person at PSU had been called an autistic snowflake by a teacher who had not believed she was a democrat when he was, and another person walking with a cane had a toilet crumble under him while the insurance and the school just let him sit in a room for hours forgetting about him. Both brought their cases up but the insurance said they had investigated themselves and that the school did nothing wrong, or that they would not pay for it.

That is the kind of thing I hear about time after time, and I have found the insurance company PSU uses to be the biggest group of bigots I have seen in quite a long time. It is aggravating, except unfortunately lawyers also do not want to face the school, or they already work closely enough that they are unable to be talked to. Another person had their wheelchair damaged by a faculty member slamming a door and the insurance said the wheelchair was too weak for use.

That sort of thing is very difficult to advertise in favor of the university for, and especially when for the student government to support you have to be part of the club or get forgotten. It makes it difficult to be an advocate when the people you try to look at for are being lied to because for a university the size of Portland State, they can make those changes very easily but choose not to.

Nine months has been a lot to learn from but the worst part is when you are powerless to help, but what can you do, but try to make the most out of learning the problems even when no one will hear it.

Has there been a time that at your job it seemed to be the same that you would not be heard despite it being your job? How did you handle that?

Stay Strong.

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9 Months and A Kirk

It has been almost one full year since I had done more of these posts, and you may wonder why. I did not want to waste the time when I was not sure what to write myself. It had been one of those things that had bothered me but where we are at I think we have a lot to go over.

For those who do not know I do use my Instagram, although not as rampantly as before. First, there is something I do want to talk about.

Charlie Kirk and Turning Point USA has been something I had joined in the year, even though according to some I am more on the left. I think if you put all my ideas on the line between left and right I think it would even out, but I will say I am thankful for joining TPUSA because it got me to look at my beliefs more in depth and while I did not believe with some, no one believed everything 100%, but the talking was something important to the group.

Being part of TPUSA did not mean that I had to believe everything that Charlie Kirk did, and in fact there was some issues we did differ, but as some of the people wanted to have a conversation there was a time where I had to find and figure out more in depth what I believed and why. This process made me realize there are people who are going to be lost not because they believe differently but because some people have values and use it on what they believe in politics while the people I have the biggest problem are with people who look at politics as the moral structure not thinking how politics need to bend.

It is weird, because even Charlie Kirk had things where he disagreed with, but that was okay, it did not stop him working with people and I think if you do not agree with someone but are still going to at least see them as people. Versus the opposing side where hard impassioned leftists claim where they have to agree and the people they associate with have to be the kinds they agree with and that just means they are losing out and making their side smaller with each move.

Now those hard leftists may have a good idea on something but the problem is also they have been is that their zealotry for their own beliefs means you have to have belief in everything or it counts to nothing.

I am sorry but for people who hated him. If you thought Charlie Kirk was a homophobe because he personally did not agree with homosexuality, but still worked with it, treated it as a difference of opinion so people can walk their paths, then I am sorry but that says more about you.

Also, new rule, you can’t suddenly try to debate a person because they are dead and can’t answer when their work had been to talk about things. It makes you look like you had points so weak that it couldn’t stand to a string of Christmas lights shining on it. Sorry, Bill Maher here we do have a habit of gimmick infringement, but for everyone I do hope it gave you a chuckle.

Stay Strong.

Rest Well Charlie. I don’t agree with everything, but if we see each other again, I got the first drinks for the sake of thanks.

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An Outlaw Returns

It has been a little bit of time. Working on some civic projects, and trying to get more people involved in civics if not politics. Sometimes all you need is the first one.

I am not happy with how people have gone more to the left in the city of Portland there is a group of people clamoring for blood based on things that not one person cannot prove with bending themselves into a knot in some moral purity test. There is a problem here that these people do not understand they are making, because for all the wishes of violence for all they claim how the left has never had violence on anything, there are those who had seen it and lived through it.

Being homeless it was never the proud boys that beat up the homeless or stole their stuff, it was antifa. It was not the republicans who thought me to be a stereotype but it had been the leftists time and again. All of this had been personal experience but had also been the experience of those who been in my position as well. Moderates had been nice, but for those who had this idea of leftists or nothing, the ones that make politics their religion are angry when others have a different moral code.

What worries me about these people on the hard left claiming they want blood think they have the unspoken majority when nothing in the world says it. It is not even something that any poll has even spoken and on the left I do not see that. For the city of Portland I am worried about this wanting to pick a fight because I cannot see anyway that this idea of social justice will be able to stand if they demean everyone who does not believe in the same thing they do.

There will be more posts coming soon as the summer and the pasty ear has been exciting. And a lot of progress has been done but it has been something where working through the bureaucracy has been painful at time but it has been something that allowed things to change in smaller ways thinking that those with more power if driven can aim to get stuff done.

Before realizing I live in a city where everyone would bankrupt themselves as an own to their political opponent. It makes me wonder where this will lead, and how we can avoid the worst at the end of it.

I will go over some of the things new, and I hope your years have gotten better.

Stay Strong.

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Sample of Writing Time

The first book I self-published on Amazon, Writing Time is about a young woman who dreams of something amazing happening in her dull life and finds often it is closer then you think, but it comes with some questions she has to answer about who she is as a person and how she stands up to things, or doesn’t when things get tough. Here is the first few pages worth here for you to read.

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I had just gotten the job, fun it was not, but a girl had to pay the bills. Like telling this story, it taught me something I never thought possible, even making me feel more than I ever did beforehand and telling you this. Although it may be very comforting if what my other friends say is true about what they understand so far. Still, it will be a happy day when this is done to know that the two of the most magical men exist somewhere out in the world.

Two years ago, when I had just got the job at the supermarket on the north side of town near the high school where all the places to hang out were. Being the newest person hired in the store, I did not get a set schedule from week to week, just told to be mornings one day or swing the next without any significant problems. Some days I would come in to suddenly be a cashier or stocker or even help the baking crew. Making sure to get there a little early whenever my shift started got me in the good graces of most people in power. Each shift had its own different set group of people who had been there longer because obviously tenure meant everything no matter where you worked. Being the floater, I usually worked the morning or the swing or some odd hours between both shifts. Individual shifts had their own little quirks with their own people in charge except for the assistant and store manager. This was a thought that made sense no matter where someone would choose to work.

We had a very small graveyard shift, one which suddenly took a vacation. No one wanted to cover it, and most did not want to approach the subject of who had to cover the shift. One of the assistant managers was a red-haired single mother who still could have rocked a runway. She was one of my closest allies then. Before she got pregnant, she made her way up as an amateur model without going to her head. Janine was her name. She also made sure that everyone called her by her first name to help with the “lines of communication, so the store does not turn into an asylum with uniforms.” Her words, not mine, but still it described her because she was just like me for the most part, stuck in a place she did not plan for.

Have you ever asked a question that later you wonder if you should have ever asked? Looking for an answer to any question was painful when that effort would highlight you as the answer to someone else’s problem. No one else wanted to cover the shift. The taboo seemed to extend past just talking about it, as I would soon find out. Being on one of my ten-minute breaks, I soon walked into the open door next to the walk-in. She usually would be at the desk with paperwork, calls, or just enjoying her day, which at some points was just the case. Trying to make conversation, though, I stepped into it.

One of the graveyard shifts had needed to take some time off with more than enough time in advance that it had to be given. Finding a replacement for the shift was difficult, but asking if anyone was found to cover it yet was the worst thing to say. Looking at the various work posters on the wall, she looked up at me, putting the question together with her thoughts to form the answer that worked best for her and the store.

“Actually, yes, I did. I was just finishing up the paperwork on it now.”

Reading the various corporate emails for various incidents, it was not until I saw her face with a smile on it that made me nervous. Trying to voice my concerns, she did the despicable something she so rarely did when she did it this time. No one could stop her. She described the situation, letting me know that my choice would not help because of her position. Painting the picture the best she could, there was a wage increase for working the graveyard shift; the other people had been working the shift for more than a year. No matter how odd they were, she told me they were still very good people, if a little strange. Deciding that pulling rank would not leave me any options, I spent the rest of my day glumly trying to wheedle what information possible out of anyone else. Some customers even heard me grumble about it behind the till, with one apologizing with a twenty-dollar tip that was definitely against the rules. Walking away from it fast enough that returning it was not going to happen, it soon found its new home in my pocket with a mixture of fear, apprehension, and joy.

Getting an extra twenty dollars was always something that cheered my day up. Except when someone felt sorry enough to do it only after hearing me grumble that soon I would be doing graveyard shifts for a whole month. Anything that made people pity me that much and did not fill me with the comfort that everything would be alright. Call it a girl’s intuition. It just did not feel right in the pit of my stomach. Ben and Jerry always made those feelings go away with the generous funding from the customer. Mulan would be my movie of choice to make the night an altogether warm and fuzzy affair, no matter how bad it would be.

Working to lunch was otherwise normal sans some cashier in the till next to mine giving me the whispers how everything will be fine paired with a look that made me think everything was a lie so that she would not get put in my place in case I were to drop dead. Closing down my station for lunch, the store was not as busy that someone needed to be on my till, which was great because I used to think it was weird when someone would use it only for me to get back to everything set up different. All of my co-workers that I once asked as I walked back gave me the look of selfless pity. The small girl inside my head was bouncing up and down on the imaginary couch, hoping we didn’t get murdered by robbers, gang bangers, or vampires. It may be rare that those things may happen. It was just scary to think of it, no matter how impossible it may be. One of the lifers may have either noticed my growing state of unwarranted panic or just heard what I was in for.

He had white hair defined with black streaks paired with a face of many years. Acting on the balls of his feet walking to my table made him seem young while being old in some version of kid never growing up or adult who found it is much more fun to act like a young kid sometimes. In either case, having someone talk to me then was good. Robin was one of the lifers out of the deli department who had eyes like an old professor who loved tricking students who fell to sleep in class.

“So nervous?”

Shaking my head from ceiling to floor hard enough to rattle my fillings it was still painted with my scared little mini-me now in the fetal position on the little cushion. Then, wondering how long it would take before my form could match the little girl, he gave me some information that only put the vampire fears to bed.

“Here is what I can tell you. When you work with Jake, you will think he is just another addict or some goth. Paul is another game entirely, but they are good at what they do when they work together. When you work with them, they can change how you look at things. Both have a lot of life experience despite their ages. Just treat them well, and you will do just fine.”

Listening to him say that made me feel like nothing would happen because he looked like he had been around a little bit. Squinting to read the name tag on his shirt.

“Isn’t that a girl’s name?” I asked, already falling victim to the seemingly capable aura of friendliness he gave off.

He did not take any insult as he answered with the same half-grin as he pulled his lunch from under the table before beginning to dig into cheeseburger hamburger helper.

“Yup, it is an odd name for a male, but that’s what my parents gave me. Shrugging defense, I couldn’t help but return his smile.

Picking up my own used lunch bag the day seemed just bright enough that everything would be OK. I was walking out the swinging doors back into the main store past the avocado and vegetables. Mothers with children peppered picking produce for meals while one pulled a young daughter from the tomatoes trying not to get her blouse stained with one of the Spanish reds—the rest of the day from the till went by with the only problem of a short-tempered customer.

Not many people work on the night shift, so it was challenging to think how many people got this knowledge of their reputation. The other assistant manager does it sometimes he has not had any problems. He was out on a hunting trip, so he’s coming back to save her was not going to happen unless something on par with your global miracle. He hadn’t gotten a problem working with the shift directly. The thoughts are trying to figure it all. It just spun like a merry-go-round. No answers were to be calculated until later, so the best option was to just enjoy the extra dollar per hour while I could get it. Working all night does suck, essentially putting the boots to my social life. Running through the cashier work on autopilot made things much easier to finish up than paying full attention. If I thought about it any further, I would just throw myself into another fear whirlwind.

Getting into my old Crown Vic, the ice cream was sitting in the plastic bag before I got caught in the rush hour traffic. Feeling the phone in my pocket rumble with an unread message, it was most likely Jessica, Brandy, or most likely mom. Making sure to check it when I got home, the small niggling doubts were still in the back of my mind. Could they be the kind of people that were really spiteful? Maybe they just didn’t like people? Why would they stay on graveyard shift when it absolutely kills your social life? Is Jake an addict of something, or just like Robin said, was he just looking like one.

Calling some of the morning girls from work, I found that they liked Chinese food, frequently having a plate of it on the side of a table in the break room before they packed up to leave. Seemingly, they were roommates who worked on the same shift as one of the younger girls, even though they were a little closer than that. After telling me to investigate their relationship while working, the phone vibrated off my shoulder between the center console and passenger seat. Don’t judge me about it. My mom always said you couldn’t do it while driving. Making sure there was no one on the road. The best option was just to yell in my car that the phone was stuck, where home was, and that they would receive a call when I got back. All left was getting home to watch a movie with Cherry Garcia at my side to figure out my plan to get on the good side for the month I was sentenced there. Walking around to the passenger side of the car to pick it all up. Everything was in my hands before stepping over the slightly unclipped lawn to my house.

My mother worked at the bank while dad worked at some office building as an internet security specialist. Closing the door after walking in, it all seemed to be normal. Both parents were still out by the looks of no other cars in the driveway. It had only taken a couple of minutes to get everything started with my usual practiced routine until there was nothing left to do except for me to hit play. As Mulan finally figured out how to fit in with the Chinese army, the plan seemingly mirrored my own. First, she tried to play their own game before letting her personality shine through. Eventually, learning her tricks made me feel like if things got to a worst-case scenario, that wasn’t being fueled by bad horror tropes.

Getting a good rest before my parents got back, the most challenging part was getting my schedule ready for tomorrow. Trying to sleep in seemed like a good idea to come up rested, except it made me feel more like a headache was already warming up.

It was warming up. Figuring out a combination of all the information my friends had told me left me with being confident in my work and a bag of Chinese food equal to a couple of family-size dishes of general Tso’s chicken and some fried fish item. There was this little place on the way that a family-owned often place a couple of miles away that made what I thought was good; I just hoped they felt the same way. If they didn’t like it, there was always a place for leftovers back at home. Pulling into the parking lot with the food still warm in the containers made me feel something else that had begun to gnaw at me.

Orange lights flooded the parking lot with faded white lines marking out the various places where the town would often park half their cars when they would meander through the store over the day. Knowing there would be only two other people made everything seem more foreign, like something not supposed to happen. A failure upon the entire world could have occurred looking out on that parking lot, yet no one would be the wiser. Closing the door with a clash, a miniature nail of fear scratched up my spine as the food in my hands seemed to be a little beacon of life that all was well in the world. But, it also let me know as I clutched it like a teddy bear that may be reading horror when working at night would not be the greatest of ideas. Creepy stories from the internet, on my phone would just have to be read another time as the long walk to the only unlocked door at the back of the store seemed to call for something horrible. This was the kind of crushing, foreboding darkness that people used to relate to in the old movies.

Shuffling quickly to the side of the building with no one else in sight, all thoughts of who would accept her was removed for the deep fear growing in the pit of her gut. Pushing through the door, the bright halogen lights made everything in the back a little more cheery neither person was back there, still leaving her with the overwhelming loneliness. Keeping the bag with her made it very easy to turn to make sure to lock the door as the last person entering for the shift. Morning crew would come to help finish up the polish and small chores while the main point of the graveyard was to stock the isles, receive the orders and make sure that everything would be maintained for the most part from day today.

Half the lights were off in the main store to help conserve power, making the feeling of crushing loneliness return. No customer was in the store, while three aisles over at the other end of the store were the few notes of some techno-rock. Moving closer, I could hear a pair of voices chatting, one in a husky bass voice while the other stood a little higher. The larger one had a tuft of bright blue colored hair covering a grey-blue eye from where I was standing. Rings from lack of sleep gave him a ghost-like appearance from the half of his face that could be seen. His frame seemed scrawny in a place only to be covered in thick ropes of muscle around his arms and legs. The other was a couple of inches shorter with broader shoulders to hold another fifty pounds. His hair was a long dark brown with a hat that reminded me of a cowboy’s with the wide brim.

Despite being the shorter of the two standing a full head under the taller man, he still had to be six feet tall. Taking a deep breath before moving forward, my steps clapped against the tile, making the moment drag out. My bag of Chinese food was tight in my other hand; the hope was that fear did not come across, pushing all the confidence left to the front. Putting my hand out, I could see him run around puffing out his chest, looking at me for a single second, his friend silent as well.

“Jake and Paul, right?”

Looking at me for a moment, he just nodded before thumbing over to the taller man.

“That is Jake, and this is Paul, so you must be Rebecca, correct?” His voice seemed to echo more than usual, making it seem like he was louder than he actually was. Suddenly it occurred. I did not answer as he just looked at me with a single eyebrow quizzically arched before shaking my hand.

“We don’t bite. We just are rather private people for the most part. So you must be the new replacement, correct?”

His question seemed to snap me back out of whatever thought bubble I was drowning in because my voice came back quickly, shooting that I was not a replacement. Guffawing for a moment, it seemed the wide grin settled on him like it would the Cheshire cat or the old pictures of Theodore Roosevelt. Wide grin with eyes so dark under the hat gave the same quality of noticing his mouth before the rest of his face. Then, hearing the familiar rumble of the phone, it was quickly pulled out before he looked at the taller guy to show me around where some of the supplies were.

Walking back, he talked in what I found a very mismatched voice. Yet, for all the fear his appearance had, his voice was just that comforting. Looking back to see the shorter man stamp his foot once the words hushed even in the mostly silent store. Turning back to Jake, he was looking back at his co-worker.

“Do they allow you guys to talk on the phones while you work ?”

Turning his head back to me, he thought for a moment shaking his head left to right and back in thought before telling me that as long as the job had been done, they had a lot of leeway on the shift, more so than any other shift.

“When he has to take a call, it normally is important.”

You can get it online here (click me), and I hope you enjoyed this little taste of it.

Stay strong.

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Final Round With A Rival

Let me tell you a story. Two fighters get into a ring. 15 rounds are on the clock and as the time runs you see these two fighters beat the holy hell out of each other. Swing, counter, swing planning, counter planning. Then sometimes they will just come together and beat the holy hell out of each other. After a while Other fighters look at that match and they go these two had something. Between them, whether it was respect or hatred or just there was something additional there, that’s a rivalry.

Five times. This will be. This month makes the fifth time me and my rival and Game of tones are competing against each other and the score is they have won twice against me. I have won twice against them. They got a third event where I could not compete, so they have three victories to two for me, but in competition against each other. Out of four times it’s evenly split two Vs two. So. This is the reason why I also had to come back. Now. There was part of me hoping I could get by and not have to deal with my rival. I am laughing as I write this because it’s almost poetic where I’ve wanted to get to three victories. They got to it first because I had to go to my schooling and focus more on that. They are now in the crosshairs and for me to get it, I have to get by someone who’s been essentially a thorn in my backside for this competition.

We will go to the final round. Both of us have lives that are moving faster. This may very well be the last time both of us can do this kind of an event against the other. Inside us is also that little bit that I know they have as well. They go “OK, can I do it a third time?”  I wonder the same.

The person that will win this? We’ve had to go through hell as a writer because there was someone in your shadow pushing you just to do that little bit more, that extra repetition, that extra page, to put it how close we have been. For the four times we have competed against each other, we have never been more than 5000 words apart. 5000 sounds like a lot and for those who are new to this, it sounds Titanic. For those who are doing 500,000 that’s less than a couple hours. Three of the most recent times it’s been less than 2500 separating us. Anyone who does anything in competition. If you do something very well, let’s say you are a running back and you get 10,000 yards overseas and you make new records in your area. You do everything and when you look at the national records for the year, you realize you’re second by 10 yards.

Going into business, you have a rival business and they make $1,000,000. You are awarded as the best new business in the city because you made $1,001,000. The difference is  minuscule. It feels like inches and when you have gone miles to lose by inches hurts. It stings, it burns, it makes you swear. Funnily enough, we both have done it. Part of me wonders if I can do that again, and I cannot tell you that I can. Because if this is the last round, it would kill me if three separate times someone got by me for the sake of maybe an hour’s worth of work in a month-long competition.

What has to be the greatest piece of comedy in all of this is that neither one of us would be so strong in this kind of event, or writing on the whole, if it weren’t for the other across from us. Pushing us just to get that extra little bit more out of us. The reason I use dictation sometimes now is because of them. During the last event, we were together after the second week. Both of us had put in more than 50,000 words daily. We also made a novel. Both of us had made separate novels in a one-week time frame. Now you may hear me say 50,000 words and novel interchangeably. Some people may go that’s too short to be a novel. I use this because as it has been practiced from National Novel Writing Month, the idea the goal is to make a 50,000 word piece of writing. Now, depending on who you talk to, it could be more, it could be less, yeah. 50,000 in any case, is the goal that everyone understands.

One more time, one more challenge and one more chance to change the past. You get one bullet to do so and you ever find yourself in a position like mine, then you will do everything you can to make sure it goes to where it needs to go. How it is done though may be them ore interesting thing because win lose or draw there will be some changes. We will not be the same people we were when we started this challenge.

The final round is going to start and this is going to be the rubber match between me and my rival all for the sake of seeing not only who can do more but just as a point of pride between us. It will be tough but when the time starts working against you it is when we will start to see the test on the soul. It is never when things are going well, that you find your drive for something. It is only when things go badly, or you face an opponent worthy of it where you have to check your gut and see if there is enough there to get by them.

Part of me is also sad, when you have someone like that you expect them in other challenge to almost be there, especially if you put a lot of time into competing against them. Finality, that colors everything and it makes you see exactly where the story between the two of your ends. I guess in a couple weeks, we are going to find out.

Stay strong

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New Experiences & Looking For Leads

This post is going to be something different. I don’t like asking for things. It has come from a lot of times where other people. I could see others needed it more than I could. At this moment. There are things I’m going to ask you, the readers, for. Obviously, let’s get the easy one. If you like my book or you like my stuff, cost me a couple bucks. Generally with these sort of things, there’s got to be one ask for money. I’d like to just put it at the front. That way you can all just kind of gloss over it.

What I want more then anything? It isn’t money. I know that’s a shocking thing to say, but I understand things are tight. If you want to give me money, I will not say no to it. That is not the major reason to this post. That’s not the main reason for this. What I want to do is there are a lot of different things I want to get further into. After this month, I’m going to focus on getting more of my work together in different formats, whether it be for voice acting, or whether it be for speaking. And I would like to see myself go a little bit further in those different directions to round myself out, so to speak.

Each of the following skills I’ve done some work in and I would like to do more. This will be split one skill per paragraph, so it’s very easy to see what’s going on without having to read the whole thing period. Writing with a dictation machine, I understand I can get a bit long winded. I can talk like a hamster and a Mobius strip.

Voice acting. There isn’t a set thing I want to do while a voice acting, whether it be dramatic reading or add reading. I want to take my voice and make something more out of it. I have a very deep tone. If you’ve ever heard me on stream, I will never hit a high note worthwhile. If I ever need to sing the Oogie Boogie song from The Nightmare Before Christmas or Scar’s part from Lion King, That I can do that all day without much of a problem. Projects in voice acting that I have done Include the various readings on my YouTube channel for different books, different stories, a lot of fan fiction readings. I wanted to get that out there. It was fun. Give it a try if you’re ever bored. Advertisement readings for my Community College. They did a whole ad setup where I was one of the main voices. It was a very entertaining experience and it’s something that made me look of doing it more. Other than that, bit parts here and there so I have some experience I would like more. It’s something that will probably mean I’ll have to set up a specific page just to have all my portfolios in one spot.

Public speaking. I enjoyed doing my speech for the community colleges in North Carolina, I enjoyed speaking to Phi Theta Kappa when I was an international candidate, and I feel with my experiences there is a lot I can speak on to at least make it interesting. It is one of those things where if you have to deal with my way of speaking for long periods of time, you’d rather run your head into a cinder block. However, when it comes to a 30 minute speech, even if it’s a long interview. Generally, I have found that the way I speak is very animated and enough where people are usually invested. This makes it a good thing because moving forward. I want people to be invested in what I have to say. I want them to find it worthwhile.

Let’s start with those two skills right now. What I am asking you is to look around my stuff, whether it be my YouTube channel where you can see the readings or it be my Twitch channel where you can talk with me in person, in living color. What I want is if you know where there may be some speaking opportunities in the future. Granted online works better, I would prefer it. That doesn’t mean I can’t travel. Generally. I am in the Pacific Northwest. So, and because of health issues, I am unable to drive. What’s the health reason? Well, I pass out sometimes. That means that doctors are generally not too happy to put me behind the wheel of a one-ton vehicle. Granted, I’ve seen how some people drive on the highways. I feel that even though I passed out, I have a better than coin flip chance that I’m going to be not the worst one on the roads.

If you like my writing, or you think that my writing works to a style that you find useful for one project or another, let me know. I would prefer to be paid for it. I am a college student. Money is nice. However, I know there’s not a lot of money going around right now, so if there is something that you think I can do, well, we’ll figure it out, just let me know. That has to be what I want moving forward. Money is great. I would prefer the opportunity to show that I can do more things at a high enough level that people can enjoy .

These may not be within the time frame of this month or next month. Take it like this. If there is something that you know, even if it’s a website where hey, there’s a lot of parts going on that may be useful for you, send me a note. Let me know because if I feel it’s crap. Then I’ll call it out, but at that point, you can tell me why I am wrong, and we can have that conversation. I may be an idiot sometimes but I have no problem taking my lumps when I need to. There also may be something I don’t understand about this business online for either one of these skills where you can correct me. This is a learning experience for me. I am doing this on the side trying to figure this out while I’m trying to figure the rest of my life.

Thanks for keeping an eye out for me.

Stay strong.

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Million Word Month?

For those who do not know, doing 1,000,000 words is a challenge period to write a million words for projects for books for stories for blogging for everything that creative writing can be and in to do that in 30 days is going to test yourself. Generally, when it comes to something like this, I will go with the flow there will just be ideas and writing putting it all together seeing what we have. I cannot do that here.

This is a task that will require my full focus and with everything on my docket this month that is going to be incredibly tough. So, what I have done is I actually built myself a game plan a way for me that I know I can do and get to 1,000,000 words in 30 days now the reason I have to do this. Last time I wrote about my rival, well last time I was unable to compete they decided to defend the house I represented because I had to go do schoolwork and they did so very well they did the most anyone has ever written. Unfortunately, me and them both being here now means we have to compete with each other and now that means I have to try and go for what they did because I do not know if they’re going to do it again.

Now, I have been really slow in getting the books out. I apologize. You know, there are other things I’m doing. Also, there is just that I don’t feel comfortable quite yet, but I’m working on it. We have one on board. We’re getting the rest out. The problem is there’s going to have to be 10 other book projects I need to finish during this month for me to hit 1,000,000 words. I need to do 33,000 words a day.  Let’s put that in perspective need to do the following in 30 days. I need to write the equivalent of Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand and Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell in 30 days. I have to write essentially the length or the equivalent of the Twilight series by Stephanie Meyer. That’s the four books: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn. More than The Hunger Games and Lord of the Rings books. Together by the site I’m using for research, The Hobbit comes in at 95,000, Fellowship of the Ring at 177,000, The Two Towers at 143,000, and The Return of the King at 134,000. Hunger Games you have 99,100 and 1100 thousand. I have to do all that in 30 days, and granted, it’s actually going to be a little more than Lord of the Rings and The Hunger Games series together cause that’s about 850,000 words. I essentially have to write just under the length of the entire Harry Potter series in 30 days. According to Capitalize My Title, it comes in at 1,084,000 words. I have to hit a million. It took J.K. Rowling  almost a decade. It’s going to have to take me 30 days. Woo

What’s the plan. Plan is this. Obviously, there’s going to be posts on the blog because this is a form of creative writing. It is something where I have to train different muscles. There are going to be at least 20 different fan fictions, so if you’re the kind that likes that sort of thing, there will be more coming in very quickly. I must write 10. separate. books. Now in game of tones. There is something where editing does count for portion of words. I will be using that. Raw writing is going to be tough to hit a million on, however, I am using a dictation machine right now, which is a reason why am I writing sounds a little different on the blog because I’m just speaking it into a microphone to save my bloody wrists.

For those who are unsure if I really do talk like this. Yes, I do. It annoys everyone that has to deal with me. A lot of people think I speak like I’m from the 1920s or 30s. No, I’m not that old. However, back to the 1,000,000 words. There is a plan, there is a way to get to this point and hopefully with the tips and tricks I have learned. The focus I’m putting towards this. A dozen or so energy drinks in my fridge to help me along. There is enough here over all of that that we are finally going to get our third victory. I hope.

If you are unused to writing for long bounds or long periods or long anything, I would suggest starting off with a little bit of fan fiction. What is fan fiction, you may ask? Is it as bad as I’ve been told? There is a bit of a stigma about it. The way I have explained fan fiction, the way I have told people to look at it is you are already invested in a series in a way of writing and description that really speaks to you. What you can do is to use that knowledge and have it kind of as a lab. Not quite a scientific lab, but a lab nonetheless, because you will be experimenting with how you, the writer, do things with values you already understand very well. This is how I think fan fiction works, especially when it comes to writers because they often have series that they read, that they love the characters, they love the settings or descriptions, or they just love how things are put together. This is a way for writers to try it, to see what’s under the hood, so to speak, if you’re a mechanic, to see the playbook a little bit better, if you’re someone who likes sports in any way. It’s a way to see how everything comes up, to make it what it is. Hence, If you like to try and push yourself riding, have a fan fiction project as well. You can do a bunch of different ones, it’s a nice little. Way of doing things where you learn but you also get stuff done and people can give you some reviews on your writing. I have a profile on fanfiction.net. Sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad. I think I’m kind of mid as a fan fiction writer no matter the link will be put below where you can check it out for yourself. There is a lot there and it’s all over the place.

Fanfiction

Reflecting on how things have gone so far is where this plan has come off the rails a touch, because not being able to focus solely on this has been something that I knew would be a problem. This takes a lot of time and focus. As of right now I need to do a lot more to catch up but I have more time open in the next couple weeks so it is not so much that it is out of reach, I am a quarter of the way through the goal amount, but that means I need to do three quarters in two weeks and that will be difficult.

Stay Strong, and Keep Rolling

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What I Have Been Doing (1)

If you have been reading these posts for a while you may find it surprising I do volunteer. I actually made an effort to do so by going into university to try and cover possible weaknesses in my schooling. Less than three weeks ago one of my contacts needed me to do a speech, 20 to 30 minutes, online to a group of people in a few different community colleges. In fact, you can look it up it was call NoTED. The paperwork on the licensing so the whole pun on notes, I am guessing, was made. I think it works.

Now for some people this would take a month, or two months or I have heard some going three months out to properly prepare. I was given about three weeks, and I did it because I thought I should see if I could. Turns out I can, speaking about overcoming challenges and adversity, and despite everything it went well. As well as can be said in any case, the school who was hosting the event seemed to have glowing terms about it. So, I guess I do public speaking (?) now.

Seriously, between this and the voiceover work this is getting fun in the oddest of ways. Try new things people, you never know where it may lead you. One day if I ever have kids I will have top tier dad-lore, between the voice acting experience, the street fighting and the professional cookery. Even if I do not have children, I hope some of the next generation learn sometime the number one piece of advice is being ready and able to do your best. That has got me more than anything else, and even in places where I should have been more knowledgeable about the different crafts I was in. Volunteering I have found to learn more crafts with a patina of doing something good for society, it does help others but it also helps me. Sometimes you have to pay for your lessons in time and energy instead of money, and if you can find things you want to help then it will be good to get that extra on the resume.

Funny thing about volunteering, often times if you have a heartbeat and a wanting to help, they will train you to do stuff you never did before. This often comes with real life experience so its something you can count on to help you get more time on it in the future if that is what interests you. Volunteering is interesting because as I stated earlier you don’t need any experience to get some. You do not need a degree to work in say broadcasting now that maybe the issue is it may not be a glamorous time or place to volunteer and that is something where you have to find it within yourself if it is worth it to do.

One thing I am working on, is a book for students of all kinds particularly disabled to get the most out of their college education so that when they leave college for whatever reason with whatever degree that they have they feel that they are the best equipped that they have the extracurriculars and experience to make the most of their time disability or not. This is something that was going to be done through my off hours, however, work found it worthwhile enough. Overall groovy, it may be mine, it may be theirs, it may be both, and at this point there is nothing I could care less about because it should be written. This month I have to try and write (ha) some past wrongs during events past and now I am also a university student so the rest of the things I am doing does not stop whether I wish it to or not. In short it will be a barrel fun that will most likely lead to at least one doctor chewing me out for pushing too hard, or going to the hospital or doing something they do not like because I have the IQ of a particular gourd popular during this time.  I do have a plan for what I need to do and there will be some efforts made to stick to it so whatever chaos I would like to bring has to be put at the wayside for right now, because there will be things that need to be corrected and someone has three victories over me and that don’t sit well worth a bit.

For those who do not know, I am talking about Game of Tomes a group of people where 3 times a year we get together and write and edit as much as we can creatively to figure out exactly how much we can do and it’s more fun than national novel writing month. Now I have done this for a few years now save for this last one because of my studies, and my extracurriculars, and everything else I tend to get into for some odd reason. In any case if you would like to join us in learning how to write large amounts or editing. You have a novel that you really want to just spend some time writing with people who are doing the same you can join us on twitch at game of tomes. For those who are new, during this time you have 30 days to write or edit or do something word wise to help your score that score affects your house your house is when you get to choose but whatever choice you make that’s going to be the choice you stick with throughout the event now there are different houses major and minor I am part of house chiroptera or if you know your animal terminology the house of the bat.

Whatever house you choose each event is 30 days. In those 30 days you just do as much as you can you compete as a house you can compete against rival I have a rival it feels like the Batman and joker kind of situation between us. In any case I learned how to write a lot more because of this I have a book out now on Amazon you can order right now reading this because of the writing that I had to go through and because of my rival. My suggestion would be do not try to start off and think that you’re going to beat everybody no one did I did not every winner who’s done the most in this you know has not done that we have had to grow into it and sometimes people feel that they cannot and legitimately writing I have found is a lot like a muscle. You must train it. You must work with it. You must get the information to maximize it.

Despite how much of this month is going to be chaotic for me, I hope you come and join us I hope you enjoy it and if you want to join the House of the Bat in any case as always.

Stay Strong.

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Part Time Advocate

From that it morphs to a lot of different things, but I will say one thing that encapsulates it all. I understand my grandfather’s love of booze, because he would drink like it was water and then show you could do anything with it including driving. No joke he was able to pass a driving test drunk save for the blood alcohol content, and the person could not tell he was a bottle of vodka or whiskey in. The cops even brought him on once to a closed course because he argued it helped him drive better.

Sad or funny thing was that he was right. He was such a nervous wreck that without booze you would see him second guess himself and whether it was just part of his life for so long or he needed it as he said it helped turn down the volume in his head to focus on what he needed to do. When he did that, he was very good at a lot of different things. Despite his reasons, he also just loved alcohol, and while I make sure not to drink as often as he does. I can count how many times a year I drink on my hands generally. The ability to turn down the noise, especially after dealing with some weapons grade idiocy, is something that will make me want to invest in alcohol production for the years to come.

Being an advocate particularly for disabled students is fulfilling and angering, and before anyone thinks, yes still I am a student in economics and business. Advocating though has a lot of problems, because very literally there is about 5% of the population around that is perfect to help and give you everything you need without causing problems. 10% cause problems every so often and a little one on one time to polish it out is what they need to make them feel like they can continue in school. That 15% I can work with all-day, all-week if I could.

For those who can math to a responsible level that means I did not talk about 85%. Disability is an odd thing in the fact that people know of it but there is an out-of-sight out of mind aspect to it and a lot of groups in the school may not put that in context. There are also, unfortunately, people gaming the system who just want an easier life and that is one of the groups that makes my work difficult. My job is to advocate that someone can do great work in lieu of a disability, and that helping navigate that disability in class or school job whether it be needing of labeling or if they need someone to take notes because they physically can not, I am all for that.

Then there are those who think just because you are disabled you have to have everything handed to you, and those although are not the majority. They are enough that when they do damage it takes the whole department to work against it and after a year we may able to erase one bad time. A lot of people have negative times and the reason that damage has to be caught is that it takes one bad experience for a teacher or a business owner to look at someone like that go to the bad experience and think it’s all useless. Some people can get past that. I can get past that for me sometimes, because I am stubborn, but some of these people come out of homes that taught them they are not going to make it, they come out of places where they always see them fall short, and if that doesn’t piss you off then you don’t know what some of these people can do. I am not saying there will be perfection or it will be easy. School will be difficult, especially if you are driven to better yourself, that is the way for me. I have to carry smelling salt around because I am so exhausted sometimes, I pass out.

Then as I am going through my days, something happened and really it started at the elections for PTK in Florida. A lot of people do not come from those homes where everything is good, and this is why I try to help any student who needs it. I may not be good at this, I may not be taught for it, and I may be one of the most evil people in this department. There are a lot of good people with no blood on their hands, and mine have been painted red sometimes it feels like it never goes away. My advocacy is also me doing everything that can be done, because sometimes the only thing someone needs is to know that something can be done. That something is within reach even if a thousand lemmings say otherwise. Rewrite your ending, make your life the story you want to tell the next generation and give no quarter when people try to stop you. Showing that it can be done, despite everything is why I do this, and it will not be what I do forever, but for now, there is a black hat in the disability advocates and sometimes that is what you need.

So for those reading, if you think you can’t than you can and if you think I am a loud arrogant egotistical dipstick. Well, you may be right on that one, but I am doing my best to make something positive out of my best traits. I will say when you see the path you are building and it begins to happen, handicapped or no it makes you feel just a little more alive than you ever have been.

Honestly, I’m guessing its how the old pirates felt seeing the open sea, that’s how I feel, and it feels good. May the sails bow your way.

Stay Strong.

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