Part Time Advocate

From that it morphs to a lot of different things, but I will say one thing that encapsulates it all. I understand my grandfather’s love of booze, because he would drink like it was water and then show you could do anything with it including driving. No joke he was able to pass a driving test drunk save for the blood alcohol content, and the person could not tell he was a bottle of vodka or whiskey in. The cops even brought him on once to a closed course because he argued it helped him drive better.

Sad or funny thing was that he was right. He was such a nervous wreck that without booze you would see him second guess himself and whether it was just part of his life for so long or he needed it as he said it helped turn down the volume in his head to focus on what he needed to do. When he did that, he was very good at a lot of different things. Despite his reasons, he also just loved alcohol, and while I make sure not to drink as often as he does. I can count how many times a year I drink on my hands generally. The ability to turn down the noise, especially after dealing with some weapons grade idiocy, is something that will make me want to invest in alcohol production for the years to come.

Being an advocate particularly for disabled students is fulfilling and angering, and before anyone thinks, yes still I am a student in economics and business. Advocating though has a lot of problems, because very literally there is about 5% of the population around that is perfect to help and give you everything you need without causing problems. 10% cause problems every so often and a little one on one time to polish it out is what they need to make them feel like they can continue in school. That 15% I can work with all-day, all-week if I could.

For those who can math to a responsible level that means I did not talk about 85%. Disability is an odd thing in the fact that people know of it but there is an out-of-sight out of mind aspect to it and a lot of groups in the school may not put that in context. There are also, unfortunately, people gaming the system who just want an easier life and that is one of the groups that makes my work difficult. My job is to advocate that someone can do great work in lieu of a disability, and that helping navigate that disability in class or school job whether it be needing of labeling or if they need someone to take notes because they physically can not, I am all for that.

Then there are those who think just because you are disabled you have to have everything handed to you, and those although are not the majority. They are enough that when they do damage it takes the whole department to work against it and after a year we may able to erase one bad time. A lot of people have negative times and the reason that damage has to be caught is that it takes one bad experience for a teacher or a business owner to look at someone like that go to the bad experience and think it’s all useless. Some people can get past that. I can get past that for me sometimes, because I am stubborn, but some of these people come out of homes that taught them they are not going to make it, they come out of places where they always see them fall short, and if that doesn’t piss you off then you don’t know what some of these people can do. I am not saying there will be perfection or it will be easy. School will be difficult, especially if you are driven to better yourself, that is the way for me. I have to carry smelling salt around because I am so exhausted sometimes, I pass out.

Then as I am going through my days, something happened and really it started at the elections for PTK in Florida. A lot of people do not come from those homes where everything is good, and this is why I try to help any student who needs it. I may not be good at this, I may not be taught for it, and I may be one of the most evil people in this department. There are a lot of good people with no blood on their hands, and mine have been painted red sometimes it feels like it never goes away. My advocacy is also me doing everything that can be done, because sometimes the only thing someone needs is to know that something can be done. That something is within reach even if a thousand lemmings say otherwise. Rewrite your ending, make your life the story you want to tell the next generation and give no quarter when people try to stop you. Showing that it can be done, despite everything is why I do this, and it will not be what I do forever, but for now, there is a black hat in the disability advocates and sometimes that is what you need.

So for those reading, if you think you can’t than you can and if you think I am a loud arrogant egotistical dipstick. Well, you may be right on that one, but I am doing my best to make something positive out of my best traits. I will say when you see the path you are building and it begins to happen, handicapped or no it makes you feel just a little more alive than you ever have been.

Honestly, I’m guessing its how the old pirates felt seeing the open sea, that’s how I feel, and it feels good. May the sails bow your way.

Stay Strong.

Things done, things going.

College is going, some say well, I say it could be better. In any case there are some new things that have occurred and is going to be open to you all soon. Yes, the books are going on amazon, one can be ordered in paperback starting Halloween and it is the first real novel length (50k) I did for Nano and Game of Tomes. The rest are coming and maybe in different forms, I am learning this whole self-publishing thing. The first is writing time, a story about how a young woman finds out that the magic and adventure she craves is sometimes closer than she thinks.

Now, I am also working on learning how to be a better advocate, because a school picked a black hat wearing outlaw to be someone to defend the people going through the halls of not one college but two. That was a bit of a problem over time because as I got more serious about it there was more to do. I have made no qualms that I do not think myself as a good man, and hopefully none of that bled here. What I realized is after all the fighting, the scrapping  the clawing, and brutality. Sometimes you need someone who is like that to get jobs done, and that is okay.

There was a lot of growth that was done since I wrote last. I had a lot of lessons and painful roads, and a lot of standing before the final bell. I found out that groups made moves to make sure that I would never climb higher than I was. Big groups that tilted the table because they could not break down my morals, that I was the outlaw to their mediocrity.

To those who read this thinking they got away, I do know. I know who you are, and I know why you did it. Something weird happened looking towards the stars because when multiple groups felt I was the outsider, the too fiery, the too strong, the too hard. There was a moment of calm. Everyone that joined me on those battles learned, and grew. One outlaw turned into a group of more than fifteen in one case to learn and a group of twenty. These people now look to help others because they saw a loud too old college student put some cracks in a lot of doors and while none of them broke, a lot are much weaker now. I know what’s coming, and you may have stopped me, but I am not the last shot, and now both groups must see that there is more coming. Have fun with that.

I am still not great about speaking with my emotions on this blog. Call it a bit of growth I may still need, but there is always something that could use work could it not?  One thing that many of you may know from working near me or with me, is when someone wants to step on my toes, then they need to realize that there is a price to pay. Disrespect never did well, and my wall is filling with certifications and awards that people thought would never happen.

This will be going up on the first day of November because of a couple things, first is that I will be returning to Game of Tomes with a little bit of business to handle. Second, by this time one of my books will now be available in paperback on Amazon. That is something I did not think would happen but sure enough that is the case.

It’s mine, and even if you read it and hate it, it still exists and that’s good enough for me right now.  

Writing Time on Amazon

The problem is the other books that will obviously need a cover and then I must finish some series up including the devil book.

Devil book? Yes, someone made a comment how releasing ten versions of a book where it is the same save for the ending would be brutal, and who knows it may be eleven because I have a sadistic streak in me. Think about that if you read a novel, you are engrossed, and the ending is one of however many.  If it is a bad book, it will be laughed at, and if it is a good novel otherwise, I feel the Post Office will have to start x-raying packages any “fans” would send me. Logistically, it does provide some challenges because that would mean you would have to have all ten endings written and the leadups and that would be the equivalent of a new novel. Then it must be given at random at first, and then after that it needs to be verified so that they can choose the one they want.

Doing like that I feel could be good and would be different but not painful because after all the endings are out you can just find the one you want. It would also be good because then you can see which endings people like and why. After a while you can make a hardcover version and have all the endings in one place, and because my sadistic streak can be summed as the equivalent of a highway. I would put a new ending there specifically for that release.

Rating wise would have to be careful as well because the endings would need to be enough to not change the rating or they can be sussed out by a quick investigation of the book.

Some people may go and not like it and say it is horrible. I understand fully only under the conditions that people like that book, and that if they do, they are entertained by the endings would it ever work out, for anything else would just be a mockery. Also, this is the internet age, you can ask a doctor halfway around the world the proper color your beard should be within a few minutes. There is some expectation there may be conversations about this then.

Stay Strong, and enjoy the book, just be aware the Epub is cheaper.

Tales from the Shadowlands

Time is fickle, but fair.

My family has left me with nothing, they made the bet that I would fail and would do so at the cost of everything. that I would not make it so they can once again try to break me down further.

What they did not know, was that this time, this time I won the bet.

3 honor societies, awards and pins that had covered one of my college senate stoles so much that other people have made the joke of calling it the generals stole. As the awards are reminiscent of the rack of medals on a generals chest. That is something that cannot be taken away.

I could not be here to talk, because there was some learning that had to be done, and it was something that could not be done and then be possible for me to write about it.

We live in a world that the more you know, the more it seems to be a horror of our own design, but in that horror there are moments where hope shines. It takes a while to see them, but it does exist.

Hope is human.

Sorry for waxing poetic. Stay Strong

Lost to the Fog – Rough Draft Beginning

From a small fishing village, nightmares had infested the land leaving many to find the peace that could be gathered and in it choking the trade of the lands while the people on it had each had to find their own way to survive. On a village over the water of the coastline Orestes had been thrown into the life of difficulty after going after his father, and in it find the orb that would lead to the Galar bangle, some odd piece of jewelry that would not come off no matter the attempt. When the merchant ships had come to trade with the village on the water the bangle had him marked for trouble. Soon, it was sent via from the far away land of the Barbosa empire that the young man would have to come to the land far to the east and had to do so in the lands of the poisonous mist.

The compound had not been as welcoming as they had hoped when they reached the large the sprawling double thick wooden walls. Where many people had been shocked at the cleansing of the area in Poptera Castle. Blight could not removed from the shrine, but it did provide an area that it was pulled from the land making those locked in the castle for the generations to be let free to a whole new world. Coming down, there was another on his quest with the creature known as Vayu. Fornax had made itself more apparent while still leaving room for suspicion to grow. After the castle had been cleared there was only a couple of days where they could stay before being ferried off finding that where the curse had been not killed but pulled from one area and doubled in another making it that much more problematic until they could navigate to the issue dodging the venomous bigger brothers of the creatures Orestes had dealt with alone.

Instead of being welcomed for their work their had been some bad words leading to the pair being the target of suspicion, but it was a rare chance that anything could be done against the choke. Realizing the depth of their troubles it was clear that the two people tossed in the mist had been in for much longer then what they originally expected coming only after several days when the travel was two at most last when the party looked. Leaving many to suffer was not an option and despite them coming through the loss of many landmarks and the attacks of vile creatures the welcome had been colder then expected where the people within tried to keep the pair out for the safety of the group above the pair trying to help and now it was simple.

Due to the pair of shrines they would need two teams and would need to be split up so they could make it back through the forests chock full of the beasts they had tried to avoid, and while each team looked to be a full quartet, that did not provide anyone any comfort. For the Compound defenders had questions of the pair, the young Men Turga and Zoran were trying to make sure the compound would be put above all else and that meant even at the cost of the pair that had come to help.

Which lead to where they currently sat, the night before they attempted this plan, and Orestes could sense the eyes of many. He had hated feeling like a prisoner and while the castle had been very open to them, the fact that their had to be a second guard found to head to the restroom. No time would be allowed without at minimum one and more likely two people making sure they could not talk with others except for the other and they would have to do so after letting both guards at the helm of their rooms know.

Reina did not feel comfortable either, where the guards at the castle had been stuffy but understanding the people here were mean. When the pair tried to figure out what was going on and compare notes of what they had found a guard had been placed on the inside of the door no matter how much they pushed and so out of spite, pulled a couple sheets of paper and an ink pot scratching notes and when their security tried to read it there was a couple of brandished weapons were pointed at the man that was wearing some lacquered wood cuirass.

There had been some negative feelings from both of them resting in the stomachs of both and it almost felt as they scratched back and forth leaving the guard to try and see only for the six blades pointed at them. While the room had been done in dark woods and with the separation of the pair in their own rooms it felt more like the pair had been jailed. No matter the attempts trying to figure out what they were communicating to each other the guard was going to be worried figuring what could be said, and despite what had to be between them the look on his face.

Orestes and Reina had not been happy with their treatment and it was clear to the both of them at the first sign of trouble that they needed to watch their own backs as it had been something clear that being alone with three other people would mean they would have to possibly fight the creatures and the team. Each of them hated to spill blood, but both had known when they had been treated in such a fashion that their health was the lowest priorities.

Fornax and Vayu had been the beings that tried to look the other way for the sake of a group of people that were just afraid. Both of them had to also realize that the fear of their holders was not displaced as the people of the compound had not endeared themselves to the pair that had to help through the mist. Where the pair of forces could be understanding, their knights had to be careful for one life was all that they had and that meant one death was enough to stop their quest.

Forces and people both knew that a mob in fear could be dangerous as the legends of the land dictated them to be scarier then any beast and while the pair did not know hoe a mob of people bound by fear lead to their predicament that was not the same for the pair of forces trying to at least plant the seed of understanding.

It was going to be rough for they had to trust these people to watch over them and as of right now the only thing that had been given is suspicion. Bangle or not they resonated well and cared for the people trying to find the path in a world so cold and as it stood them needing to write their thoughts for the sake of secrecy, and in the room that seemed to only get stuffier. In the room had been a simple hearth and after both explained their fears and were assuaged by the other to save what secrecy they balled up the pair of papers before taking a flint and lighting the thing in front of the guard as his face betrayed his hope to read it later.

The pair could make small talk while the messages burned to as making sure that nothing had been left but char and embers before smiling sweetly in defiance and allowing themselves to be taken back to their rooms.

Some of the work had to be done though, and Orestes soon was back in his room where a small tray of gruel had been left on a desk stone cold almost to mock him. It did not matter as they needed to still wonder what weapons would be carried on his person and what in his bag.

Bright still was the coral short sword of his father had the length and could cut down what was needed if they had the room, but upon asking the rest of the people would have gauntlets and that was sounding like something that could be used in short ranges. He had to figure that something long could be caught on a lot of things in a forest if the growth was thick and so the barbed knife and the princely dagger would be the pair walking in the dark forests, if they planned to betray them in the forest or not they had come to do a job, and the faster it was done the faster they all could go home.

Turga and Zoran were walking from the workout hall down to the blacksmith to be fitted for their pieces, as both would be heading one team. From the past experience they could tell it would be something they needed as much time as possible with to get just right. Walking in the light of the many torches still in the halls they made their way down the lengths of labyrinthine hallways in the way the had wished to once walk after their test, but here was something different. No matter what now, as long as both had gotten back they would be fully fledged members, and there would be some chance in doing so.

Having a gauntlet of the compound had been a sign of honor for the few that traversed the lands and now both of them could do it. What had been the problem was that they had not inspired trust in the the pair they had to gain the support of and the elders had been more suspicious then welcoming. Opening the doors to the blacksmithing hall there was the smell of metal and varnish as part of the hall had been used for the construction of all that the compound needed.

Being fit for such had been something where the personalities of the people would be seen on the weapon. They could pick the metal, the barbs and how it attached to their arm and the weapon it worked with the most. Zoran had been wanting a short extendable blade that could be retracted and protracted with the handle while Turga had let his hand remain free allowing himself to use the techniques that had been taught over the years over such times.

It would only be ready in the earliest part of the morning and what could be done for small changes would only be done after a little practice but they had the faith in their countrymen, and that their forge master was the brightest they had ever seen, however small that list may be, his skill was well known even among the elders who had regularly traveled abroad. That faith was hard to place at times but to know that some in the compound could be some of the best in the world.

Each of them had to sit for a good portion of the remaining part of the day as their arms had been measured and checked while the hot metal glowed and bent according to the stout man’s will before the piece had the skeleton built to their wishes with what was on hand. Metal ore had been rare to get their hands on for the many years but what could be found was often snapped up from the traders.

Many had already knew the risk of their mission. Working the forges he had not been a fool as to their plight and finding that it could be done once before they had hoped they could be that way once again. It was clear in his own mind that as his beard went from the lacquered wood brown to a cursed gray he knew the sun was setting on his life and he would have no other way if one of his last major projects would be helping two of the most physical young men to be in the compound to help them all be free. He could feel the metal pulling to his whim just as it had always, but this time the pair of pieces would be his magnum opus. Detail would be important and every detail had to be something that he wished for no small thing could be overlooked this had to be, as he pulled one billet of metal, something he had to make sure could be what a legacy could be defined by.

Wood and metal was something of a comfort to him to work with as the pair would chat and wonder what the plans would be he was sole focused on the metals and turning them this way and that. He had thought the time had been only a couple hours but seeing Zoran get him the dinner of fruit and roast, and even filling up the water jug made him notice the sheet of sweat coming down his forehead. Stinging his eyes and smelling of salt that almost masked the aroma of the metal in the coal forge he had to grab a rag from his back pocket letting it dry his face before being tossed away soaked from the efforts of the large man. Turga had been someone who watched from the chair as he pulled each billet and got the skeleton to both gauntlets that would go over their arm up to the shoulder.

Seeing how there weapons would be made gave both of them a bit of security, and he made sure as the hammer pounded that each strike would not crack the bars or that as they were pulled that each of them would be as strong as ever, sometimes even stronger then what could be found in the mines and much stronger then the basic metals could be on their own. He knew how to mix the various ingots to create something greater then the sum of the parts making the gauntlets something almost spiritual as well. Markings and writing would be inscribed in the case when more time could be given, but that was a detail that had to wait when they returned. When, for if he thought of if and what it could mean then there would be doubt.

There was little need to be paralyzed by fear as one had needed to be cognizant of the threats around them and with the pair from the distant lands that had been able to help them there was always the doubt that if they turned on them, could the rest of them defend their home. Pulling the pieces that would make the cage for the padding together, he hoped they had no need to find out. Knowing nothing, they had to be trusted and while there had been some evidence they could do what was needed and they were not endearing themselves to the visitors, he preyed those visitors would have the understanding to know they mean no ill will. For this building had been the lives of so many that to see the sun again warm on the faces of the youngest would be something that the oldest could live with if they had gotten through the worst of what had happened.

Zoran and Turga were both dealing with signs of their own mortality, for this was something they could not escape form they had to drive forward enough, with their teams that they could reactivate the shrines and then escape without falling to the creatures that would inhabit it Mist or not, it was a dangerous place and they had to be careful going in and out would be dangerous and nothing was set until everyone had crossed the doorway back. Where there could be so much as a party big enough the rest of the world would hear and he would not mind a bit.

After doing what could be done it was all left except to sleep and get ready for what was coming. Turga saw a note delivered to his brother that was soon put in the pocket, most likely something from one of the elders about his team and they began to walk the way back letting their steps define their movements to the bed’s they had hoped for not the final time. Letting their eyes close only their futures and that of all the people they cared about were on the table for tomorrow, and nothing would stop either of them from hitting their goals.

Morning came and everyone had to be ready. Orestes and Reina picked their sides, Reina would go with Turga on the western half while the eastern half would be manned by Zorna and Orestes and with the weapons fresh on their arms, it was with the pride of their beliefs they set their weapons and began to head out. Four warriors had volunteered and could handle the normal curse on the land but it had been only a few steps before they had to get back within the confines of the property, barely able to find their way despite the large double doors still being in sight even in the small distance taken.

Something had been worse, much worse that they could not go on. Zorna and Turga could not get them to continue and it had meant the large teams were already cut in half before setting a foot in the dark forests. Reina and Orestes were still confident in their abilities and that meant the other half of the pairs felt it as well, they could still make it and getting back and loading supplies from the other two, the four had begun their quest.

Hope you enjoyed. Stay Strong.

A Little Slamball

Some of the games have been played and it is time to go over what has been going on to this point, and because this is my blog we are going to the Slashers and the Ozone first. Both have had different luck but it is good to see that shakes and the slashers are at least doing well in third place. There has been a nuisance in the league that both of my teams have had to deal with and it is the only team still perfect. Ozone is closer to the bottom then to the top but there is more to be seen here.

Seeing the Mob do this to the rest of the league does not really shock me, it was going to be them or the Rumble by my guess. Both had been forces since day one currently as it stands the Mob Are causing Martial law by Slamball. It is Mob Rule and not many teams can handle them. On the other side of the standings we have the Lava and while only playing four games one would think they are getting blown out in all of them except look at the plus minus for them.

For those who do not know plus minus is the total of points they have scored in all of their games against the points scored against them in all their games. If it is positive then that means they are scoring more points then the league on average, and if it is minus then they are scoring less. Lava have played four games and have a plus minus of -12 one of the closest ones to zero. Mind you only two of eight have a positive plus minus. If my money has to go down, the lava may be waiting to erupt later down the line.

Something to back up the lava thought is that in all four games the biggest difference in scores between them and the opponent? Four points against the slashers in their first game. Which means they have lost by a total of eight points in the other three games, hopefully there are things to be tweaked and we can see some lava flow to some victories.

The Mob have caused damage to opponent after opponent and seemingly had the answer whenever a team has tried to change the questions bringing in new talent with sons of Slamball athletes ( Byrd has two sons, One a stopper for the Mob and the other a gunner for the Ozone.

George Byrd was on both the Hombres, Maulers, and the Riders of the past and was someone who could often surprise with the skill sometimes passing, sometimes shooting and sometimes trucking over those who stood in his way. He had the size to be a problem and when he was on the court one had to be careful for the big byrd was always ready to clear a path to the hoop. Here are a couple of clips of the father in action just so you understand during his years he was a defensive powerhouse but had some offensive flash.

Also, something I need to add there is also a 4 pt shot, and that is a shot made outside of the 28.5 foot arc. This was a new one to me, apologies for it, but it also brings some values to the long range game and there are players trying it. Just to put the Mob in perspective though here is the recap on the most recent match up between the Mob and the Rumble.

Mob is being disrespectful in dunk form, just outright mean. This is something that has not changed. Back in the first rounds of Slamball on TV there was one known as Sean ‘inches’ Jackson A man who looked at physics and went.

I am sure he is watching these games with a smile because that legacy is being protected. Dunkers go to the mob and the rest of the league gets some therapy. Hope this brought you a little more info on the Slamball. Watch them if you can on espn2 or at least on Youtube channel so they can see you like it.

Stay competitive.

Back Against the Wall.

There are moments that when things get really high stress there is a part of me that likes to smile. Like right now, I am trying to get my third victory in game of tomes, there are people chasing me that can beat me, they have the ability to do it, and just need to run a little bit longer. Push a little harder, find another gear despite things not looking my way sometimes, all of it has just to be a little longer, and I can make it.

When my time started in Game of Tomes there was just someone who came and picked me up for their team, an offer that no one else made. Despite professional editors and writers all that was on my resume was some small stories and fan fiction no one liked to read. People seemed to be so proud of what they could do, and part of that insulted me. There never was that sort of pride with me then, and because of it there was a rage that came and gave me a charge that many found hard to fight against. Attempt after attempt was made to be a better writer, and some of the efforts are shown here, some are given away here.

Now, I have been top writer twice, been second twice, beat leaders and writers and editors and are sitting on more books then ever, now so more because the time it takes to release means there is not writing being done, and the focus is the writing and the editing. Ever since my youth there were moments were people would fight until my back was too the wall, where my wrists would be sprained or broken, where my ribs were cracked by shots with baseball bats or pieces of wood. There is something that my friends back then noticed about me.

When it came to the last card, when it came to the point where it was no escape, then I turned into a devil to survive. Some were even scared it despite them being bigger then me. The fact was not that they had been trained and my size was the factor, it was the factor that when there was one way out, there would be no expense spare to make it through. In fact in different circles it is why I am nicknamed Red, or the smiling devil. Those unused to it and had to see me fight would watch as the person who was happy and trying to help them out was painted in his own blood in a brawl and was smiling.

Fun fact, my hair is still long not because it is normal in Portland, because of the scars on my scalp, it looks really scary so the hair keeps it covered up really well. The reason that these moments are brought up is that there is something almost beneficial pushing yourself to those limits in something, even if it is for survival. When something you are so invested in is your goal where anything will be the cost to be paid. You realize how far you can go, and it is always farther then you originally thought. For this round of Game of Tomes, this is where I am. Due to being behind these posts did not get typed until the last day of July.

These are the moments that make me smile. One more fight, one more try, one more goal, one more path, just me and my surroundings against others and their capabilities. No health issues, no problems no handicap, just who can do more and part of me wants it to be me. The other part just smiles knowing if we lose that it was a good fight, and that allows me to sleep. It stands that for individuals no one, not a professional writer, or editor has done more then me and the work that is in my pile is proof of that. This time there was no practice on edits save for the light ones, this was just getting it done.

Backs to the wall facing your enemy seeing the goal behind them. One more fight, one more round, time to see who writes the end of the story on the competition. Let us see if the punk from Forest Grove who got in fights can win one more. Either way I will let you know of the results.

Stay Strong and keep fighting.

Oracle of Portland

I am not an accountant. I am not a tax man. There are no degrees based on economics to my name yet. When my work and predictions are seen to be correct and those who are supposed to be good at it are wrong. Well, we should be shocked that someone without the degrees of what was needed was right when many of the supposed experts of the city are wrong. All of that would be the polite of saying the following, because some did not believe, and thought that someone learning like me was going to be wrong.

Yup, its Razorfist again.

Portland has lost a lot of money and despite me banging the drum, on twitter or x or whatever it is called. During the past few years between 2020 and 2021, it has come out that Multnomah county has lost a billion dollars.

https://www.oregonlive.com/data/2023/07/multnomah-county-lost-record-1-billion-in-income-in-2021-as-residents-moved-away.html

For those who think my actions and beliefs are too cruel on the homeless community let me make a few things clear. I have lived it, been in it because of a situation where my family decided to betray me and the supposed social nets for being a disabled man trying to do my best showed that it did not exist. This is not the blog of someone thinking on it because it annoyed them camping everywhere, I camped in some of the places too.

We need a limit, a point where if people cross they go to jail. Between the cops not having the manpower and the measure 110 fiasco there is problems after problems and what angers me what makes me want to spit venom, is that I can take being called mean, if it means some people get it through their head and are able to move their way up. For all the programs and all the money and all the feel good about helping the house less, how many people are success stories? For all the time and all the feel good policy it is rare at all to hear about a single person who had been helped and thy made something of themselves. Goodness knows that if there was, then it would be put on every paper as evidence that the path they are taking is the correct one.

When people are willing to seem mean then they can take actions that people may not like but there are actions that often have to be done especially when leading a group of people, or city, or state. For example if you give candy to a class of young kids, you will be liked but you have not done anything to help. If you are seen as a hard teacher, you may not be liked as much the trade off though is that they will be learning. Give 100 dollars to an addict and you will be more liked, but if they cannot handle their addiction then it isn’t going to do any good. Unfortunate that people in Portland are tricked by the first kind of action because the second will be what actually gets stuff done whether it makes them feel good or not. For all the resources we have, we do not get time back and wasting it like this is just foolishness squared upon itself.

It is something that will keep happening no matter what.

Stay focused and stay strong.

Also because of midterms and homework there are a lot of posts today. Sorry in advance.

What Makes You Happy?

Over the years there have been a lot of things going on on this page, and I have learned a fair amount myself. All of this has turned to answer a question about myself that my previous ideas were, that it would never be answered. Something that people think is what many people go through their entire lives, it has been something that has been mused here.

What makes you happy?

Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

What is something that feels right for you to do? Like putting a suit on that fits right, or makes you wonder why you haven’t been a part of it yet. We here in America at least get it through our heads that you have to be great at one thing. You cannot be good at many things and you cannot be someone who changes so much because they only do that when they do not know. A little bit, when there is so much pain in my body, that movement cannot be done well, there is a spot on my ceiling I will look at and it is my time to look within. Might as well while everything feels like it’s spasming physically to do so mentally.

Two things make me happy. Just two. I like telling stories, no matter the form. Games, manga, comics, stories, books, there are reasons I write so much and despite the new forms that are found month after month there is something in me that wants to see what can be done in different mediums. Stories are fun to tell, and that makes me happy, although sometimes skill in doing it, may need polish here, there, and everywhere but that is okay.

Most of the politics and issues in the state, roll into the second thing and that is completing challenges. Difficulty or how many people can be affected may add something to it for me. Top sudoku person on Twitch for a time, guardian rank in Destiny 2, Game of Tomes victories, learning how to work with people with games again, figuring out how to make music, learning how to do different things, speedrunning, backyard wrestling, cooking in cities, cooking on mountains, cooking for festivals, fashion design, and illustration, and those are a few. I like pushing my skill set and capabilities and while some may not bring money it also brings information and knowing how to do things. Unfortunately to me when someone is in a challenge and decided to act like they had a brain transplant with a pumpkin, it makes me a little cross. Well, more than a little, My first initial is T after all and that is in essence, a big cross.

Back to the point, it does not make me happy when people give up, they stop learning, some people are in the city of Portland proud they never had to read a book or read at all, those who would rather have a drink or smoke some weed and never do anything difficult again. It drives me up a wall to know those people exist, and at one point there was a thought that you would want people who want to push themselves to do so as easily as possible because then they will hit their maximum more effectively. The world does not think that way, and hunting for difficult challenges made my life more difficult because and this is to quote my family while I was homeless because of them.

“He will survive, he always survives.”

Granted then they thought it would be groveling to them and putting everything on hold, betting on how long my hold out would be. My brother-in-law knew enough that when the rest of my family was placing bets on how long it would be, he knew it would not happen. My college, something they wanted me to give up so I could be a live-in unpaid babysitter, was too important. Unfortunately, they challenged me, and I answered. Now knowing how my head works a little better it will be something that can be worked upon, it allows me to better focus my strengths and shy away from weaknesses, and it is something that you can all find for yourselves.

What makes you happy?

Let me know, and stay strong.

Ever Do Something and Ask Why Am I Here?

So I was invited to some training by the college and I took them up on it. The problem was now its full employment training. For those of you going

“Wait I thought you were just a student?”

You would be correct. They invited me once a while ago and removed me but then put me back. So ya, I am fully trained as an employee of the college. Why am I going through this? No idea. What does this provide me? Not a clue. Why would I do this? I don’t really do reasons much anymore, I sometimes just do and was able to fit it in my schedule. Every so often it seems that something just happens where we are all confused as to why or how I made this far. Mind you this is not just the first meeting. I did the rest of the online bits, pretty easily too. For some reason it is not the first time this has occurred. Some days, I get bored, and those days usually turn into new rule moments somewhere or someone.

Went to insurance sales training, wasn’t even hired by them, was offered a job because I knew they were training and after seeing me working through their training was shocked that someone got in so easily. Mind you, I am six feet tall and walk with a cane, there is not a lot of hiding that can be done for someone like me. If someone can not see me walking in somewhere that should not have me, well that is on the security. One could have the best cyber security, but if one can walk to their servers and just get the info by hand on an open computer then IT security doesn’t add to a stack of beans.

Just do things, sometimes it leads you to odd things. Chess matches with sex workers, invites to vampire balls, learn something new. Don’t know? Who really does jump right in there? You can get the basics down and from there bounce into more advanced. Life is chaos and day by day it seems to certify we are more in a clown show then ever, so enjoy it.

After all does it look like anyone truly know 100% what they are doing?

Ya, no.

I know I generally am more vinegar and salt, but there are times that you need to just enjoy the time.

Stay Strong and Have Fun

Plasmus and Defender

You know comics have had the lion’s share of heroes and villains and I think that is not right. After all, sometimes there is a depth lost in comic books that is often replaced by a number of pages or the number of books to help make that up. It has been a focus of some of my writings and yes I am still writing and yes I need to eventually just put it out there but I am nervous.

Not an excuse just a reason for stupidity, but here is a couple I am writing about right now.

Julius, a past villain once known as Plasmus the Iron Tower. A man who had been wanted by the city and managed to get out by his wit and creations. When the side of good fights dirty though he is suddenly stripped of everything he had made to that point. Left not being caught but embarrassed to the point where his family had left him he had to start over alone working in a comic and manga shop. When people decided to rob the store he laid low, he pulled the last thing he kept on him from these villainous times, and saving those in the store using the old tech had gotten him found out by one of the pair of heroes of the city. Saving the people he could in another attack the hero that talked to him was enough to crack the cold case and look at how the good and the bad both handle their business. In the process bringing down others who would have secrets tied to his own injustice brings more strife.

Defender is a genetic experiment that escaped and became a new man after hiding his powers after the experiments failed. When his powers manifested he had been someone who had been able to leave. In a new life, he became Defender, the city’s best hero and one of the best the world would see, keeping his nose clean and out of trouble the only hobbies he had was too his job and the odd stuffed animal. Outside of work, he stays to his studies, trying to be a better hero including the heroes of the past. Gregory outlived his parents and is alone, but is trying to make the most of the opportunity. Despite how well he tries there are those in the heroes and the police of the city that have tried to twist his work for their own nefarious gains.

The problem is not in the present but in the past, as Defender has tried to bury some problems only for them to be brought to light, and with Defender pulling in the chain he finds a lot more is buried than he thinks and maybe there was something to the mistakes he had made not believing the claims of the villain.

Stay Strong and Enjoy The Story